QUOTE(Callidus Thorn @ Apr 30 2015, 01:06 PM)

I'm wondering if it's the same person Blackie was talking to. Whoever that was.
*Shrugs*
No, Blackie was talking to me. He took something I said in a public post that everyone here saw (could still see, it is still there) and somehow misinterpreted what was said there as an attack on a beloved mod (which it wasn't); and somehow personalized it into me demanding he "take sides" - (which anyone reading can see I obviously never did).
From that point, he went on to say that (even though the issue was completely resolved by Starge before my Father died) - that I must have faked/lied about my father dying just to make him (Blackie) feel sorry for me and retain his friendship. (? Huh?)
Blackie said he came to this conclusion because he saw a "pattern" in his mind between me having a stroke in 2013; and having had to be gone a year. He thinks I took off that year and faked a stroke just to garner his sympathy and keep his friendship. (? Huh?)
The reason he decided that is because the month before my second stroke is when Kobby passed this same beloved mod's post count and had his account zeroed out. I said something about it on a public post, which I apologized for publicly. So once again, the issue was completely resolved. (but obviously not resolved in Blackie's mind).
So in Blackie's mind, the fact that I mentioned this person in a public post the month before my stroke and a couple days before my Father's death, he sees a pattern in it.
As proof of this, he points out that I type too fast one handed (though how he is measuring the speed of my typing, I have no idea); and the fact that I remembered something I posted publicly the year before (not like I could have re-read any posts).
Then he points out that his aunt didn't fare well in her stroke as proof that I shouldn't have recovered either. (?Huh?)
As sorry as I am that Blackie lost his aunt and for her condition in the end; I'm kind of happy to be recovering as well as I am. Blackie called my recovery "too miraculous," but the truth is that my recovery has been slower than the norm for stroke patients. The goal for therapy after strokes is to have independent functioning by a year, but the norm to achieve that is 6-8 months.
My recovery has been much slower than that, I didn't achieve any major milestones till 13 months; still can't drive or read more than a short post on here. My left eye still tears constantly, can't focus or concentrate, and words don't seem to look right anymore. I have to keep Googling them to see what their definitions are - these are words I know, should know.
My short term memory is still shot. Short term memory is what you did today, hours ago, yesterday. It doesn't affect your memories of before the stroke. It means I can read a sentence and not remember what it was about the next minute - so I have to keep re-reading it over and over to get it to sink in. That is why I have stopped reading the fics here; and why I can't write Maxical's story anymore. It is excruciating and frustrating to try and read long posts; and writing the story is impossible now.
But Blackie had access to medical professionals in his job to ask; he could have Googled strokes and learned that the damage a stroke causes is based on where in the brain the injury occurs; the amount of damage done; the health and age of the patient.
Blackie knows all this in his job; but didn't apply it to me because it didn't suit his conspiracy theory; and I guess he was enjoying playing the role of victim to my supposed subterfuge and deception, since he still clings to it at the end of his post by "forgiving" me unconditionally.
So yeah, I'm the one that blocked Blackie, Some of us place a highly inflated value on their friendship; and really need a reality check.
** Just so everyone knows, I am not trying to stir any hard feelings against Blackie. This probably has a lot to do with him losing his aunt and acting out in grief. Am I mad at him - yes; but that doesn't mean I dislike him. The friendship we had was short lived because of my stroke. I was gone a year and during that time emotions were made high by that imposter - maybe he doesn't believe this is the real me, for all I know.
Anyway, just wanted to clarify that so no one thinks I'm wanting anyone to side against Blackie or anything, I'm not. Just clearing the air; and hoping it is pushed into the past now.
Anyone who witnessed our Squirrel wars, rap wars, our RP together - knows it was a good friendship while it lasted. I enjoyed every minute of knowing Blackie till last October when he changed. I hope you all get to see the side of him that was Awesome, the one that I saw before my stroke.
I lost a hell of a lot of things in the past couple years; I'm sorry to say my friendship with Blackie is just one of them. But one thing all of us have to realize is that life is too short for this kind of BS. It is way too short. I almost wasn't here to say that, and I'm not in a great enough place health-wise to let anyone that has an axe to grind do it with me.
So I stepped off. That doesn't mean any of you should, I don't expect or want anyone to feel anything different about Blackie based on his dealings with me, just like I never let his dealings with anyone else stand between my friendship with him. I'm real sorry he feels this way, but life is too short; so my philosophy has to be to not let the door hit you.
*