I didn't say "stop that," I said "I'm so fat," LMFAO

Oooh! I thought you said stop that

I found my long lost wallet! And there was $3 in it!

My Internet is out and my tech advisor (The Boy) has gone to the beach for the weekend.

I'm about to go get the hammer.

Go to "Control Panel," then "Internet Options." Click to clean out all cookies, wait till it finishes. Click "OK."

Click once on the "Start/Windows" insignia in the lower left corner of your monitor. In the address bar type in %tmp%

Click on the little folder that shows up at the top of the "start" box. Select all, delete all it will let you delete.

Power down your PC and then unplug your modem (or Reset it if it has a Reset on it).

Wait three minutes or so, then come back and plug up your modem. Wait till all the lights have settled down and are lit across like they are supposed to be.

THEN (not before) power up your PC. Your internet should work now. If it doesn't, it is the IP address and Comcast (or your internet carrier) should be able to reset that.

^^^I'd much rather buy a new computer.

Just kidding! -strokes computer keys- mama loves you, you gorgeous, resilient thing, you!

ROFL Your comment just made my day. I was in a pretty bad mood.

I was walking around treating everyone like This dark elf dude.


EDIT: This is the most disgusting soup I've ever eaten! I think I poisoned myself -vomits-

I just cleaned sh*t off of my two year old. I left him downstairs with my husband for FIVE MINUTES so I could check my schedule for work and come back and not only has he SMEARED it on himself, but he took a few experimental licks of his own feces.

-pinches bridge of nose and sighs-

GROSS!
And be careful with bypassing the auto censor. You might get in trouble for that.

My daughter used to remove her diaper and "paint" the walls with it.

That's pretty nasty mALX. It must have been horrible cleaning that...

This is why I avoided my sister's children when they were using diapers. If I had stuck around, she'd make ME change them....

Speaking of [censored], the soup I made tastes like it...at least I THINK it does.

According to my MIL, my husband used to do that, lol. So while we were stripping my son of clothing for a bath, I looked him in the eye and said "HE LEARNED THIS FROM YOU!"

lmfao

Scrubbing and bleaching the walls was the easy part, but every single time she did it the crib/furniture/etc. had to be scrubbed and bleached too. And I couldn't potty train her to save my life. I finally paid a professional "potty trainer" - they had her using the potty within two weeks. No more wall painting.

That's...that's a thing? Oh praise the LORD!

Once I awoke to him sitting naked in his bed with a poopy diaper hidden under his bedsheets. I was like "Why would you do that?!" And he just babbled about Dora the Explorer.

That's when I lived in Miami Florida. Anything you want done there, they have someone that is a titled pro to do it for a fee. She guaranteed she'd have her fully trained in two weeks, but it took more like 1.5 weeks. She was well worth the fee.

How do you take screenshots in oblivion on a PC?

Go to Documents>My Games>Oblivion and open up Oblivion.ini.

Under [Display] find "bAllowScreenShot=0" and change it to "bAllowScreenShot=1"

After that the print screen button will take screen shots. I'm not 100% sure where it actually puts the screen shot files, but probably where ever Oblivion.exe is located on your computer.

You are right. It puts the screenshots in the Program Files/Bethesda/Oblivion folder. You have to move them to your gallery.

Another question: How do you do that in a Mac.

I'm about to google it but help would be appreciated...

You start by getting rid of your Mac...

He did! XD he spent the ENTIRETY of his bath last night recapping every single "Go, Diego Go!" episode he saw that day, sound effects and all. He's such a fanboy. I can't imagine where he gets it from. -wide eyed innocent look-

It was a service issue. Thanks for the advice!!

I hate math

I'm glad to be done! Oh wait I'm in programming...

Good job! XD

Oh wait, I'm a cashier...

So I was busy editing something, and my son is lying next to me. He's being quiet, studying his hands and such, when all of a sudden he plops both legs onto the keyboard. I screech, of course, and he starts cracking up. I start tickling him and say, "Why would you do that? You're so silly!" and he's cracking up while I'm tickling him and he yells "Dude, STOP!"

I laughed until I nearly peed myself, lol

I'm going to cry! I have so much homework my heart is racing

Lol!

I was worried this was going to be another story involving fecal matter.

Not today. Not today XD he hasn't been out of my sight once! Except when I left to go get groceries and found his dad doing dishes and my son stripped of all his clothing in the middle of peeing on the floor.

Sigh. Does anyone have some Vicodin or something?

Hmmm, I fell down the stairs chasing the dog to put him in the cage so I could go to Walmart. I drove all the way to Walmart and forgot what I needed to buy, so I came back home and began working on homework.

I could really use an aspirin right now.....


Uuuhhh...my back.

Oh good, no poop, just... ...*sigh*

So glad that isn't me.


Dude, holy crap.

My little punk is passed out on the bed wearing Justice League pajamas.

No matter how many bodily fluids he throws at me, I'll always love this little guy <3

Were the stairs leading to the kitchen or away from the kitchen? Lol. Sorry you were hurt!

The stairs in the kitchen that lead to the basement. So yeah, it's pretty much a kitchen related injury.

-snort!-

I knew it would be, your horoscope every day should read, "Stay away from the kitchen!" I really feel bad you got hurt though.

I'm fine. My back just hurts. I didn't break or sprain anything

BAHA! -snort- -cough-

Next time you'll listen to me, lol. "Quit chasing dogs and driving to Walmart when you have an obscene amount of Math homework that needs done!"

I'm the biggest procrastinator in existence.

I think what I needed from Walmart was important though.....

-buries face into mattress-

-muffled-

HAAAA.

All people with ADHD eventually learn to keep a notepad with them and jot down tasks/important info while it is fresh on their mind because later anything may happen (like chasing dogs and falling down kitchen steps) to wipe it from your memory.

You may as well learn that now and start writing stuff down, because ADHD does not improve with age, people with it just learn ways to counter it. (spoken by someone who has to write every single frick'n thing down).


EDIT: PS: This does NOT include writing down the answers to your math tests on the back of your hand.

That's a good idea, but I'll most likely lose the notepad.....

I'll give it a shot though. Hopefully I don't trip and stab myself with the pen though....

-squeals with laughter-



-howls-

ROFL!! Keep the pad in your front right pocket, it cant go anywhere without you being aware of it then. I wouldn't suggest keeping the pen there just in case you do fall and stab yourself. You'd be singing falsetto.

Lol. More like my scream would be heard all the way in china...

I'm just going to walk around with a wheelbarrow of dollar bills and bribe people into letting me use their writing utensils.

I'm moving to your town and keep circling the block with paper and pens, be right there!

My Hero!

Watch out for my neighbor. He likes to watch people through his window

(He's worse than glarthir)

Glathir, ROFL!

My dad fell down and had to go to the hospital, they put him in a ground floor room that looked out onto the entrance of the hospital. When I left he would go to the window and look out to wave at me. The last time I visited him before I left my sister was in there with him and she came to the window instead of him.

So (of course) I was goofing around, dancing and making faces at her ... well, suddenly I realized that there were other people in the next rooms watching me, plus a nurse and security guard standing in the entrance watching me!

Lol. That must be like having a whole pack of glarthirs staring at you

You must have been a bit embarrassed though.

I remember once the sink in the bathroom was leaking, and my sister asked me to fix it (she expects me to be mr. Handy man ) and I accidentally loosened it instead.....

Lets just say she had to get the floor redone, and I had to pay the bill.

SPEW!!! I actually have done this too, but to a friend. I was visiting/staying with friends in Miami (a few years ago). Went to take a shower, turned on the water before getting in so it wouldn't spray cold water on me. Well, their hot water tap just kept turning and turning. So I kept turning it waiting for it to stop me. It didn't. It suddenly flew off and hot water was spraying out of where the tap used to be! (And spraying everywhere!).

And that was just my first day visiting!