I thought so too.

Elisabeth Hollow: Evil vampire lord obsessed with killing you and all of your kind? punch him in the mouth At one point my solution to everything was hot glue. My sister chased me out of the kitchen once with a broom for suggesting using hot glue to fix the broken coffee machine with hot glue.

Acadian: I had a hell lot of fun writing those parts I had actually walked into a tree once while hiking with a friend and I got so mad I punched the tree (and learned my lesson on why you shouldn't punch trees the hard way)

Grits: Thanks for reading I don't get many new readers often, and I hope you enjoy the story.

Adios post

Ah, the quest for a shirt.

I imagine it was very difficult for Westley to return to The Imperial City in ruins. After all, as the Champion of Cyrodiil, he had not that long ago saved the Empire. And it seems Vokun has now exploited the vacumn to take control of the White Gold Tower.

‘I needed a new tactic. Throwing random stuff at the window obviously wasn't going to work.’
Yup. Good thinkin’.

’My fur was spiked straight up.’
After that wild escape and slide for life down the tower, I can imagine! This gave me a fleeting image of mALX's dear Maxical with her fur similarly spiked after a similar fright.

So Vokun still lives – with his mouth unpunched even. And now Hjalfi’s missing as well!

I did have a writing question for you. Why do you begin almost every bit of dialogue by putting a blank space between the opening quotation mark and the first word of dialogue? It would seem both easier and more correct to forego that convention. Just sayin’

There better be some gods-damned mouth punching soon XD

Get rid of this

Pls no ban idk how else to dispose of this

** Reread from beginning to get back on track with your story.

Chapter 6 - Re-commenting Chapter 6, the first time I read it was at my mom’s with a LOT going on to distract me.

Your tongue-in-cheek humor rolls through this chapter (and the whole story) with such subtlety - the werewolf traveling with vampires and worried about assassins - that had me rolling, as did the “don’t call me boy” line (and Imbel’s response, “should I call you ’lad’ then?” - loved that!).

Also loved this little scene:



Then this had me rolling on the floor:




OMG, I was screaming at this line:



This has to be the greatest dungeon crawl ever, with all these powerful characters (yet still so normal in their dialogue) - I am Loving this story, and the subtle humor in your writing!

BWAAAHAA! I’ll bet I know who that Bosmer is, too!


Chapter 7 -



ROFL !! The whole verbal fight between them here had me dying laughing!

Absolutely Awesome scene with Hircine, LOVED that!



SPEW !!!

I love this chant, did you write that yourself or is it in game? Awesome Write on it if you did it !!!!


Chapter 8 - I am loving this werewolf lore you add into this chapter, this gave me a lot of background info on the Wolfsebane vampires (and Vokun) - very good touch! Love the continued digs into Hastrel, makes him a very visible character even when he isn’t on set!

LOVED these lines:



And:




Very sad and powerful scene when Ben dies, Awesome Write!


Chapter 9 - Very much liking the friendship developing between Imbel and Wes, and LOVED Jakben‘s little fit of anger, lol.

Also loving this pegging order you have laid out in this chapter. Now we know who the most powerful are and who secretly desires to be alpha - you are doing a great job with this! And now Hindaril - this is going to be great! I was disappointed in game that Hindaril was such an easy kill, as much as he was touted by Melisande to be the most powerful vampire.


Chapter 10 - Starts off great with some more of your well thought out name-calling of these beasts! Love your imagination for these rolls!

This war was inspired, and a very well done surprise! Loved the touch of the scene with the child, in the midst of everything going on it seemed almost surreal!

Hastrel redeemed himself in this chapter, especially with this line:




I loved your drawing of Westley sliding down the tower! Better than I could have done, and your illustrations really show how deeply imbedded you are into your characters and story - that makes it that much better on top of its other merits! Loving this story!


Chapter 11 - So Rex is still up Vokun’s butt, huh?

The Imbel, Hastrel, and Westley all arguing about WHO was going to get the dead mouse - this had me in hysterics !!!! The addition of Fjola is a very interesting one, I wonder what will come of that? Awesome Write, you are doing great with this story !!!

The dead mouse bit made me laugh so hard...reminds me of the video of the little girl playing with a dead squirrel XD

It was a great idea, and perfectly timed, to give us a glimpse into what Vokun is thinking and plotting.

I loved the whole dead mouse pet scene!
‘Jakben fell to the ground when the little girl punched him in the crotch.‘
Now, when she gets a little bigger, she’ll be able to punch him in the mouth!

'He had the creepiest smile on his face.
"Hello little girl, what's your name?"
Her frantic reaction confirms Hastrel has quite the way with children – not! This was well-written, conjuring just the creepy impression you intended.

Finally, you used this whole scene with the girl to show that Westley the Werewolf has a good way with kids – and that speaks well of him.

mALX: Welcome back, and I hope 2013 will be a better year for you.



For now he is, but he's not as loyal as Vokun believes.



I wrote everything in the chant myself but the parts in Latin. The Latin parts are from a song called werewolves of Armenia from a metal band named powerwolf. I thought those lines were pretty coo, so I added them into the chant.

He's going to cause a bit of trouble at one point in the story. I remember fleeing Skingrad when I saw I'm following me. I didn't go back to Skingrad either until the mages guild quest sent me there. Well, the pest caught up to me, and I had to do his quest.

Acadian: Thanks! I'm a bit better at writing from a villain's PoV. I'm not sure why, but I find it easier.

Elisabeth Hollow: The squirrel video was hilarious. It wasn't my inspiration though. When I was real young, I found a dead mouse in the backyard(I think it was a mouse I can't remember) anyway, I had walked into the house and asked "can I keep it?"

Whys there 9 pages

Really, Hjalfi? REALLY?? Westley don't want your stinkin' Alpha position.

And Rex is stupid, lol

** I hope you nabbed Glathir's keys and broke into his secret wastebasket vault in his house - I got 600 or 800 gold out of it, can’t remember which.



SPEW! I absolutely LOVE the dialogue and personality you write for Jakben Imbel!!!!



You know, I’ve left the side off on my PC in order to access the wires frequently to fix them when they jar loose. You keep making me spew Pepsi and you’ll fry my PC! I am LOVING this story!



ROFL! You did it again! I need to send my bill for cleaning my keyboard to you!



OMG, I LOVE the humor you weave through this story !!! Awesome Write !!!!

I had to laugh at Imbel trying to groom Fjola for the Thieves Guild.

A tense battle with Rex. Now Westley is right to be concerned that Rex’s escape means Vokun is likely to learn of Westley and Imbel’s plans.

Well the vampires may not be anxious to help but those werewolves. . . yikes! Kill your way to the top!

Elisabeth Hollow: Hjalfi actually knows that Westley doesn't cae to be alpha, but since Westley quite strong, and getting stronger every day, Hjalfi consideres him a threat. it has more to do with proving strength and dominance that wanting to be alpha.

mALX:

Thanks for telling me about this. I found 800 gold in the basket, but I think the guards took it back when I got arrested for assaulting glarthir



Yes, this story is all part of my plan to destroy your PC

But you might want to cover that up with something. I remember I dropped my phone in a bucket of water at the beach, and it didn't have a case so it broke for a few days. Someone might come along with a glass of water and accidentally spill it all over your PC, and since the side isn't on the damage could be worse than if it was.

Thanks for reading and I'm glad you enjoy the story

Acadian:

That's the thing. The vampire's intentions aren't 100% good (With the exception of Imbel and Hastrel), but they're not too aggressive, unless they're on Vokun's side. I'm not telling you what the goals of the werewolves are yet, but they are far more aggressive than the vampires, and like you said, they'll kill to get the highest position in the pack, even in the middle of a battle.

The old "tripping with a glass of water trick," huh? Now that you said that I am keeping a close eye on my husband and his beer can when he wanders near my desk !!!!!


** EDIT: WOO HOO! Linkin Park!



*

2013 was a cursed time period

That was quite the tooth and claw fight, but I’m glad that Westley prevailed.

“Perhaps I should have went to the Arcane University to buy a healing spell instead of Edgar's Discount spells."
"Edgar Vautrine. You don't want the very best. You want cheap. And I got cheap."

The interaction between Imbel and Hastrel continues to be priceless. You’ve done a fine job crafting them as the odd couple. It seems their bickering will make it a long trek to Skingrad!

Drama queen.

Lol. He's actually more like a petulant child than a drama queen, especially when he doesn't get his way. In simpler words: He's very immature.

I loved the discussion about Hunting for Hircine! What a great fight!



Haha! Love this line! Another great chapter, lots of action in this one! Great Write!

Me too XD And I'm a wife!

Like a few hours after we got married and were on our honeymoon, I asked my husband if he brought his toothbrush. He said no, and I said "Ew." And he goes "WE JUST GOT MARRIED, STOP NAGGING, WOMAN!"

XDDDDD I love this man.

Acadian: It's a pretty bad idea to buy spell's from Edgar Vautrine in-game. They're cheaper than the arcane university, or the other spell shop in the city, but don't plan on running into an oblivion gate while using the spells you bought from Edgar and coming back out....

Elisabeth Hollow : Like a few hours after we got married and were on our honeymoon, I asked my husband if he brought his toothbrush. He said no, and I said "Ew." And he goes "WE JUST GOT MARRIED, STOP NAGGING, WOMAN!"

A few hours into marriage and you were already nagging him? That's a

Just kidding. I remember I forgot to bring my toothbrush AND my deodorant on a camping trip once. I was forced to sleep outside....

mALX:

When I was writing this chapter I also happened to be stuck at my sister's house because the heat isn't working for some reason at mine. She began nagging me about putting my feet on the coffee table and the "What are you, my wife?" line was my exact response. I had just started the writing that chapter, so I decided to throw that line in there....

Everyone:Thanks for reading my story guys! Even though there's only three of you, it's nice to know your taking time to read my story.

You probably know about my heart racing problem, well I went to the doctors today. They took a blood test, and I'm still waiting for the results, but the doctor said that it most likely has to do with stress, and that I should watch my blood pressure and diet(looks like I'm going to HAVE to manage to cook.) I should get the results from the test soon, but the doctor said that I should be fine.

Also, thanks for the suggestions on helping with my insomnia and heart racing. My heart isn't racing that much, but my insomnia is still getting the best of me

Your story is giving me lots of entertainment :] I love it :]

Perhaps I'll do something else in this section

Cut back on salt if your blood pressure is up. Also, panic attacks are very very common, lots of people suffer from them.

I am loving Imbel's role in this story, he is a real take charge guy people around him can rely on to get them through whatever! A good friend to have, really good Westley met him!

Hastrel keeps me in stitches with his whining, arguing, and nagging !!!



SPEW! Don't have to tell me who that was, ROFL !!! Awesome Write!

I am beginning to wonder what they're gonna do with Hastrel, lol

A road trip! And wow, Westley almost drowned. Neat how you did that ghost thing with Ben. I wonder if there’s more to that and if Westley will be seeing Ben’s ghost again.

Well, after getting the arguing vampires sorted out (somewhat), they made some more progress and pulled into a cave for a nice day’s rest. Uh oh . . . now they’re rooted!

*

Hope it's good news on your heart and you can get some help to sleep better.

I see what you did there.

mALX:

It's nice to know he actually has a personality. In-game he doesn't seem to have one. in oblivion he's quite rude (unless you bribe him, but ALL of the NPC's in Oblivion are like that ), during his quest he'll act like he's afraid if you, and then he tries to kill you, and dies in the process, unless he glitched like he did in my game

I tried use some of his in-game personality (he can be very rude sometimes and is quite a good liar) Honestly though, my favorite character personality in my story is Vokun's. You'll see later in in the story that he's more crazy than he is smart.

He lets nothing stand in his way, but he's been consumed completely by power-hunger, and it's slowly dragging him to his grave. In other words he's a stubborn, self-centered, greedy, insane [censored] that doesn't realize he's destroying himself, and everyone around him in the process.

but at the same time he can Lie his way out of almost any situation, he's extremely discreet when he makes plans, and he makes sure to find a way to eliminate any flaws in his plans. To top that he has an ungodly amount if patience. He could be planning for thousands of hears just to eliminate the flaws in them.

The only problem for him now is he didn't plan everything out as carefully as he normally does. He went straight onto battle, knowing the strength of his breed of vampire could wipe out the entire legion in a matter of weeks, and now he's usin the palace as a mouth-piece to garner control of the Imperial City. The only problem: The werewolves are standing in the way, but I'm not telling you their intentions. I'm usually a villain person so I'm quite proud of his personality.

End of rant

Elisabeth Hollow: Hastrel will learn to pull himself together......someday Until then Poor Westley and Jakben have to deal with his childish behavior.

Acadian:

Lol. Literally. Have you ever noticed how tangled those roots are though? I'm surprised nobody can get stuck in them. I'm also surprised they don't break no matter what you do to them.

Everyone: I know that this update is a bit early, but I most likely won't be able to post another chapter until next Saturday. Between school and taking care if my niece and nephew, I just don't have time on weekdays.

EDIT: Oh, and if you see any spelling or grammar mistakes, please tell me. I proofread more than once, but I never catch all of my mistakes.

Lock thread pls

Hastrel is such a BABY lol

Yes, those cave roots are amazing. Very tough, unyielding and even subject to random spasm attacks.

I wonder what that bluish light in the cave was? Didn’t we see Ben last time they encountered that? Or maybe it's a ghostly spy sent by Vokun?

‘I also wanted a bath. I smelled like a wet dog.’
I guess this is a real consideration for a werewolf. I wonder if sniffing them in the rain could be a way to tell if someone is a werewolf? Oh my. . . and I completely forgot about fleas!

Snapping bears in half is bad, but snapping off the horns of rampaging minotaur lords is a good thing!

And so they go bumping and bumbling along on the way to Skingrad.

What a cool twist with thinking Vokun had used spriggan somehow to make himself invincable!

BWAAHAA! Hastrel worried about the others shaving! ROFL !!!

Nice detail about the Will-o-wisp making a high-pitched noise that hurt Westley's ears! Good thinking!

And a cliffhanger for Hastrel, what will the others do without his whining and nagging? ROFL! Loved this chapter, you have some great ideas here!

I love it! How funny that they got tangled in those creepy roots.


Oh, Westley!

Hastrel is very entertaining. There will be no end to the whining if Jakben drops him!

Yay, free time! I can post the next chapter  

Elisabeth Hollow:

That's true, but he'll mature later on in the story. He's a big chicken though, and will flee at the first sight of danger unless someone (usually Jakben) forces him to stay and fight. He's pretty good with destruction spells though, so even though he's not physically strong like Vokun, Jakben, Count Hassildor, Hindaril, etc, etc. he's pretty useful in and after fights because he's also a good healer (and is more that capable of frying someone to a crisp with a fireball )

Acadian:

I remember once I was exploring a cave and the roots just randomly spazzed out and injured Westley. I couldn't see what was "attacking" me so I fled the cave  

Bethesda should have made those roots more.....breakable. Unless they're SUPPOSED to be invincible, I see no reason to have unbreakable roots. (roots can be tough though, especially ones that look like the roots in the caves in oblivion.) 



What better way to bring down a Minotaur's is to destroy it's most deadly defense tactic?

mALX: I HATE the noise that those will-o-the-wisps make in-game. It's very annoying, and a noise that high-pitched must be painful to listen to if your right next to the wisp, especially if you're a werewolf.

Grits:

Lol. The agreement they made to stop arguing would instantly dissolve, Hastrel would whine nonstop 24/7 and nag Jakben to death. He'd also probably try to murder Jakben in his sleep too  

Let's get rid of this illegal story

Oh, and if anyone can get me a screen of count Skingrad I'd be very grateful. The one on the wiki.....scares me.

I'll come back and read in a few hours when things settle down some here. In the meantime, here is a screenshot of Hassildor:

Thanks mALX. Your help is appreciated

At least Hassildor is on their side now!

Oh, I most def see Hassildor decking Hastrel before too many days have passed, ROFL !! I loved some of the little details you've added to your vampire lore in this one, great world-building! Awesome write !!!

I enjoyed learning more about the vampires in Westley’s world from Jakben. Buffy was scratching her big ears over the fact that they all took turns bathing instead of all just doffing their duds and hopping in. Big prudes! But she’s a wood elf of course and water makes her clothes fall off. . . .

Ahem, back on topic here. . . Yikes! Skingrad’s been ransacked as well. I wonder if, when Westley saw the dark skies above the city, it reminded him of all those Oblivion gates he closed to save the Empire. And now Vokun is jeopardizing all his work!

I was pleased to see Janus join them. I’ll bet he’s pretty capable. I had to roll my eyes and smile to see that it only took Hastrel a minute or two to start picking at their new companion. My septims are on Hastrel to get punched in the mouth before Vikun does.

wow, I can't believe I forgot to add why they didn't take a bath all at the same time and get it over with. Nobody wanted to deal with the racoon, that's why. I just added that part to the story.

Free time! This weekend is solely devoted to homework! At least a large portion of it is I have attest next week, and I'm probably going to fail it because it's math....

This chapter I'll make sure not to leave out entire sections   


mALX: thanks for the screen! 



Imbel has been stuck with him for three months. Usually when the vampire council meets, he's the first one there.(he normally arrives to whoever he's staying with's house about two or three months before the day of the meeting and spends the time annoying the crap out of them. Since he usually does that, nobody else in the council will take him, and he usually runs off to Jakben's house. Hassildor doesn't get along with Hastrel at all. He just can't. Not enough patience.)

Elisabeth Hollow: Hastrel is going to drive the poor guy insane though. He apparently drives everyone insane. Then again, he drives everyone insane....

Acadian: I actually forgot to add why they didn't all just jump in and clean up at the same time. I added that part. I was half sleep when I posted that chapter I'll make sure that won't happen again.

Almost done

I literally threw my arms up in the air and shouted "YESS!!!' XD

It also seems we're on the same schedule for updating, lol. I was about to post an update. I'll let people read your story first, though :]

This fight with Vokun had me in hysterics! Especially these two lines:

"Stop! I'm not an axe," and "Stop! I'm not a ragdoll!" I absolutely loved this chapter, great write!

This continues to be a delightful romp across Cyrodiil! After Westley spent the initial part of his fight with Vokun beating himself up against trees and rocks, it was wonderful to finally see Vokun get that punch in the mouth! I heard Liz shouting all the way out here to my rock pile in the desert.

When Westley picked up Vokun, look him in the eye and roared in his face it was magnificent! Then we were quickly snapped right back to the humorous and quick pace when Vokun complained about the werewolf’s breath! Well done!