As I woke from the strange dream I looked up bleary eyed, my head still spinning from the thoughts whirring through my head. I got up and noticed a tall Dunmer man, who had apparently been waiting for me as he piped up straight away. He asked me if I was ok and who I was. I told him my name was Ll’Ake, brother of Ra’virr and cousin of the infamous Sa’ea. I mumbled about my baby brother Pu’delle but tried to stay quiet. He glared down at me and told me the guard was coming. I had no idea exactly how he knew this, seeing as he was good way away from the door and was facing the wrong way.

As soon as I saw the Imperial walk down the stairs I was frightened…his legs had floated down the them! I tried to run away but I couldn’t, there seemed to be a gluey substance stuck to my feet. The guard came and told me to press W, so I did. I turned to the wall beside me and pushed a big button labelled ‘W’, and the guard threw a bucket of water on me. I was rather angry about this, so I ran at him and threw a punch. It seemed I had some sort of force field around me though, as my hands wouldn’t lift up. The guard just walked off.

I sighed with relief at the fact I could now move again, the water obviously having washed the glue away, and followed the Imperial. He again floated up the stairs, but I was used to this now so floated up also. As I got to the steps leading to the deck of the ship a Redhead attacked me verbally. Then the Imperial man piped up about me trying to be civil. I was pretty much furious at this…first he had thrown a bucket of water over me and now I was getting insulted! And he called me uncivil! Anyway, I pushed the button labelled ‘space’.

I blacked out for a few moments, then fell onto deck. I looked around me, noticing several things. First a talkative Redguard was telling me to head down to the docks, which I thought was quite nice of him to guide me, but I ignored him. Instead I went to the opening in the ship. I needed a drink so I attempted to bob my head down and thirstily lap up the water that I so desperately needed. To my great horror it seemed impossible though, as I smacked into what seemed like a wall. I held my hand up to my obviously broken nose, but the Redguard looked at me sympathetically.

“Sorry, no change to faces in this game…They had enough time developing the landscape.” He stated, nodding to himself. I thought his comment quite odd, but was happy that I was not going to get any uglier so I decided to leave it for later. I walked down the ramp, leaning my hands against the invisible wall for extra balance (I was scared of water you see.). A nice imperial man asked me where I came from, and I tittered slightly. I told him I obviously a Khajit and the strangest thing happened to me.

I suddenly shrunk, and now had to look up to the Imperial! I grumbled slightly, but was getting quite used to the strange things that were seamlessly linking together into a rather strange dream. I followed the imperial into the building, scurrying slower than usual. I must have been tired from the trip. I knocked on the door and the guard punched me in the back of the head, knocking me out. When I woke up I was in the building I had just tried to enter.

‘Must be some secret lock or something…’ I thought to myself, scurrying over to the bald monk. Being quite fresh into the outside world and only knowing other races from textbooks, I wondered how he could possibly have become so tall that he had grown through his hair. I dismissed this thought as he rambled on at me, in the end asking me what I did for a living. He said he could ask me random questions and then give me a random job (Whispering that I’d most likely get rogue) or he could blurt out the list of all the jobs…or I could tell him what I was good at, and make my own job up, and describe what it was. Smacking my forehead I grunted, finding it blindingly obvious which one was going to help me the most.

I told him I’d do it myself, and grabbed a piece of paper from the desk. I dipped the quill pen in the ink and started writing merrily on the page, my tongue sticking out slightly and playing with my whiskers. Half way through my 4th sentence I realised that I had not actually written anything at all! It was, in fact, invisible ink from the shores of mainland Morrowind. I groaned and enquired about this to the monk. He told me he had been waiting for me to realise, and now gave me a big board and loads of cards. They all had things on them and shuffled the 3 packs, wondering if these would actually give me magical skills.

I unwrapped the pack labelled combat and picked out athletics. This was a must, so I placed it in the first slot under the column of main abilities. I ran from one end of the room to the other, and immediately noticed the difference. I wondered what else I would like to be trained in, so opened the stealth pack. I rifled through them, clicking my tongue as I looked at them all. I picked out lock picking, mercantile and personality. I figured if anything could make me better with the ladies it was a sure-fire bet. I placed them in the slots, and opened up the magic pack. I looked through these, then snorted at the pointlessness of them. I threw the magic cards behind me and looked back through the combat cards. I picked out longsword and slipped that in as well.

I checked over the remaining cards and thought hard about what else I would need. I put armorer, shield, light armor, marksmanship and spear to one side. I scratched my head for a bit and put axe over there as well. I sliped armorer into the main abilities slot, then laughed. There was no space! It was either longsword, or armorer. I decided that I ned to actually have a sword that I can use or else I would never have to fix it. I threw axe behind me and slipped the others into minor abilities. I looked over them all, smiling, then frowned profusely. I looked up at the monk.

“Armorer and light armor are spelt wrong!” I insisted, banging my paw against the table and growling at him. The man laughed, and shook his head.

“I know. Sneaky beggars aren’t they? They put English version on the disc, then it’s actually American!” he cried, waving his arms around sporadically. I cocked my head at the odd words, but ignored them.

“Yes….disc. Uh, well that’s my board thing.” I told him, introducing the board. I looked at it myself, and frowned again. “One moment please…” I mumbled, crawling onto the table and reaching the job title section. Next to it was many letters of the alphabet on small cards, so I picked some out.

After a bit of time I had managed to get ‘Khajit Warrior’ mixed up as ‘With roar riKaj’. I cried out in anguish at the failed task, and rearranged them again. After several hours and broken cards I got Khajit warrior spelt out correctly. To my horror I looked down and saw a space for job description. I fell of the table from shock at this point, and banged my head. I righted myself and looked around for the alphabet pieces, then sighed on finding none.

The monk awoke with a start from his small nap and laughed gently.

“Aha. This is the bit where I write it with…real ink! All you have to do is say what I am to write.” he said kindly, picking up the board and magically making a quill appear in his hand. I sat cross legged on the table and recited…

‘Khajitan Warriors, these chaps are the best Tamriel has to offer. Once defeating 20…no, 30 ….Ogrims with just 3 of their kind, they are revered across the kingdom.’ I told him, waiting for him to finish. He dotted his is and crossed his ts, then looked up at me.

“How come I have never hea…?” he asked, but I cut him short.

“Shhhh, scribe…” I ordered him, motioning by putting my paw over my mouth. I continued. ‘These are without doubt the best looking Khajit ever in the history of Khajit kind, their massive muscles never groaning under any weight, always begging for a bigger challenge. These are the…bestest things in the world….ever.’ I concluded, then leapt off the table. The monk quirked a brow at my little speech, but finished off and handed me the scroll. I put it away in my pack and started to walk away from him.

“Don’t forget to pick up your scroll! And you now have an inventory!” the man blurted out, then slapped his hand across his mouth. “I mean…Good luck.” He corrected, grinning sheepishly. I walked up to the guard and he let me through, obviously unlocking the door through his mind. I walked up to it and pushed a small button labelled space on the doorknob, and continued into a dimly lit hallway. Nothing was of interest so I walked down to another closed door, pushing the button again and proceeding through.

I noticed a sort of bed, and buckets, and torches, and various bags. They were very muddy and brown, and were all piled on one another. I figured they must be full to the brim as they were all precise shapes, and none were draped over others. I looked in them and took what they had, putting them into my backpack. I could easily carry them all, but I didn’t stop there. I took the torches from the walls, and I even tried to take the bedroll. This was stuck down by the same glue substance I had found myself in earlier…so I pitied it.