EDIT: Sorry, I meant to put this in the critical reviews section, could this thread please be moved there.

Well this is my very first fan fiction, on any subject, but it's not the first time I've written a story. I did enjoy writing this, and I would definitely like to do more, but first I'd like to know how I'm doing so far. I know it's shorter than most of the other stories I've seen here, but I would rather get a few criticisms first before taking on a bigger challenge. So all forms of criticism are welcome, I'd really like to know what all you experienced writers think about it. Also, the purpose of this story was to explain how my character ended up in jail, i.e. where you first start in the game.

On the 26th day of Sun's Dawn, in the baren ashlands of Vvardenfell, the joining of two rogue Dunmer assassins resulted in the birth of Nilos, a Dark Elf even more ruthless and fierce than his parents. Nilos had a cold heart and an insubordinate metality. When he finally came of age, he fled from the cave hide-out of his parents, and set off on his own; with the aspiration of making the name Nilos known throughout all of Tamriel...whether for becoming an honorable hero or a sadistic killer.

His travels would take him to the Valus Mountains of Cyrodiil, near the city Cheydinhal. Nilos would enlist himself into a ring of bandits, hoping this would lead to him to riches and fame. He was wrong sadly. Their scores were small, remote settlements and farms mostly. The thieves wanted to avoid attracting too much attention, but Nilos knew that these risks were essential to gaining a reputaion as an imfamous killer and master thief. Nilos would however remain with the illicit syndicate, until he earned enough septims to work for himself.

After abdoning the thieves, Nilos took refuge in Fort Naso. Here, in his haven, Nilos would would lead a life of relentless crime, and would not stop while there was still an ounce of strength in his body. He meant to do this until the day he died.

For the time being, Nilos began raiding merchant caravans heading to and from Morrowind. High risk. High pay. He'd take every coin and leave but one survivor. Making sure the story of the Dark Elf who could slay twelve men and remain in shadow was spread across the Empire. During an attack on one of these convoys, Nilos came across a note on the body of a dead Imperial escort. The vague note described a substantial convoy heading in from Morrowind accompanied by seven Orc mercenaries. This would be the snatch of a lifetime, and Nilos would not allow it to pass him by.

After careful planning, Nilos would be able to strike in the dead of night, while the convoy was as far from a settlement as possible. The night came. Nilos mounted his horse, Red Moon, and hastily made his way towards the venue.

Nilos' blood-red eyes peared over a clif, high above the mercanaries makeshift camp. Nilos spotted two lookouts, two patrols, and three surrounding a fire. Nilos revealed his bow, and took out two arrows from his quiver. First, he dropped the lookout to the North, then the one to the South. Nilos lept down from his high post, and quickly dov under a wagon. Waiting until the two patrols crossed eachother during their concentric routes, and swiftyly lunged two daggers into their backs. Nilos, crept in the shadows around the three remaining Orcs, stalking them. Listening to them. Finally, he made his move. Nilos took pleasure in horrified face made by the third Orc, after seeing his two comrades hunch over with arrows in their backs. The Orc stumbled to his feet, first trying to unsheathe his sword, but then turning around and attempting to flee, before taking an arrow in the back of his leg and collapsing to the ground. Nilos hovered over his wounded target, and said with an emotionless face...

"My name is Nilos. You will make sure everyone you know learns of what has happened here tonight...or I will come for you." To which the Orc responded...
"This convoy was carrying taxes from Morrowind to the Imperial City...the Legion will take care of you!"
Nilos, though surprised, maintained his disposition. If what the Orc said was true, Nilos would have to be as cautious and sly as ever. The Imperial Legion was made up of the strongest brutes in the Empire. Nilos could not battle them with force...but perhaps elude them with his cunning.
Nilos made his way towards the Imperial City. This would be the last place any Legion soldier would think to look for him, giving him the most time to devise his plan. After asking around the Waterfront district, the beggars stamping ground , Nilos learned of a "mysterious Dark Elf who killed over "20" Orc mercenaries escorting a tax shipment." After asking around a bit more, Nilos learned that Chancellor Ocoto himself was leading the investigation. Nilos knew what he had to do. Assassinate Ocoto and hopefully redirect the attention of the Legion. Nilos knew this mission would take considerable planning, but he did not worry about what would happen after Ocoto's blood had been spilled. Though he would prefer to not be captured, it didn't matter. He knew he could escape any prison the Empire had.

Days passed. Nilos had no time left. He could not stay in the city any longer, the Chancellor could not see the light of another day. Nilos dawned his armor, and made his way to White Gold Tower. Entering the Tower was simple, as it is open to anyone, but making his way to the Battlemages Chambers, where Ocoto sleeps, would be most difficult. Nilos felt more and more that he would not be able to escape from this stone place. He neared the door leading to the upper levels, and saw the guard directly next to it. Nilos approached the guard, and tried to look like a confused citizen. When the guard asked if he was lost, Nilos rammed a dagger into his throat, but Nilos was unable to stop the guard's body from plunging to the ground, and the subsequent thud was sure to alert other guards. Now it was a matter of time and speed. Nilos quickly stole the key to the obstructing door, and sprinted up to the high chambers that protected the Chancellor, running past palace guards at breakneck speed. He approached the final door, lockpicked it, and as quite as night entered the chambers.

Upon entering, Nilos was quite stunned to find Ocoto still in his bed, even after the no doubt noticable commotion; but Nilos would not stop and let his surprise stop him. He lingered over his bed, quickly unsheathing his dagger as the sound of the guards neared. He raised his gleaming weapon high above his head...but before he could plunge it into Ocoto's heart, he was hurled across the room after taking a powerful shock spell to the chest, from the Staff of Evangeline Beanique, the Chancellors bodyguard. Nilos had made his first mistake, actually thinking Ocoto would lay up here unprotected. He was still dazed as the Palace Guards brought him to his feet, dragging him out of the room, relentlessly clobbering him even though he was offering no resistence. Nilos smirked at the Guards remarks...

"Hope you enjoy rotting in Prison!"
"I'll show you what pain really is!"
"You think you can mock us and get away with it"
Nilos knew he had not failed, not by a long shot. This was simply another obstacle he would overcome. He would escape the walls of the Imperial Prison with ease, almost as though there were an opening leading right to the outside.