Around the end of February and the beginning of March I posted a short fan fiction on a small intimate forum and there were some positive responses. This story is being posted here on the chorrol forums as I am eager to see the responses from the larger fanfic-oriented crowd here. This seems to be where the "pros" of the Morrowind fanfic world congregate,

This will be posted this in sections, serialized as it was originally. It would be easy to just post the entire thing all at once but I thought it would be more fun not to.

This story is based on the main quest of Emma's "White Wolf Of Lokken Mountain" plugin. It contains spoilers.


Rashelle At Lokken
by Blockhead

1. Arrival, Tension

Snow. The ground covered with it. The trees white with it. The late afternoon sun reflecting off of it. The landscape was that of a magical wonderland. My adventures in Solstheim had not reduced my wonder at this phenomena. I had never seen snow where I grew up and there was certainly none in Vvardenfell.

Although I was the Nerevarine and an experienced adventurer, I arrived at Lokken gawking and gaping like a tourist at the Imperial City.

The Lokken leaflet had been in my pack for some time and I had finally decided to see what it was all about. I had no great desire to hunt animals merely for sport (as advertised) but I have always liked to explore new places.

My adamantium boots crunched on the snow as I stepped out from the boat.

"You had better talk to Ragnar Fire Hair before you do anything else, lass. Without his permission, you are not allowed to be here", admonished the boatman again.

Yeah, whatever.

I paused to look around some more. Ahead lay the village, the road ahead rising up towards the mountain. Up further, to the left, could be seen the castle, covered with snow and looking amazing, like a fairy land castle in some painting.

As I slowly walked up the road I tried to stop and chat with some people but they all seemed preoccupied ... no ... afraid. At first I thought it was me, all decked out in my ebony cuirass, dark brotherhood greaves, adamantium boots, and the sword Chrysamere on my back. That and my bare arms making me look more a barbarian than a spell-sword could perhaps be intimidating. I suppose also my coal-black eyes and coal-black hair (an odd color for a Breton) marking me as Not A Nord did not put anyone at ease.

Several people had white hair. It was not the usual blond that Nords tend to, nor a light gray. It was a bright white, like snow. I had only seen such a pure white on the fur of snow bears and other animals. Something in the water perhaps?

A woman who did not have white hair (it was brown) was little friendlier. When I approached her she said "Hello there. Your face doesn't look familiar to me. I'm Silja. Welcome to Lokken. Don't expect to find much here, though. This is a poor village. Since we are not allowed to hunt in the forests anymore, it's hard for us to get by. I assume you have been invited by our chieftain, Ragnar Fire Hair, and that you have his permission to hunt? If not, you had better stay away from the Lokken wildlife."

I thanked her and walked up the road a little further before a guard named Gudmund also told me that it was very important that I see Ragnar Fire Hair first.

"I will, but first could you direct me to a trader or general store? I may need some warmer clothing."

That generated a smile and some directions the Lokken Clothier. I actually did not need the clothing. Despite my origin in warmer climes, I have an unusual tolerance, actually an affinity, for cold weather. What I was wearing now was comfortable and the only concession to cold I had was a sleeping fur in my pack. Still I had broken the ice a little bit. That was progress. It also gave me an excuse to try to talk to at least one more person before heading for the castle.

I walked into the clothing shop. I briefly talked with the woman there, Anna. She was also nervous like the people outside but gave away some more information. The people here were in fear, but from one of their own, not from me. Apparently this Ragnar Fire Hair, their new chieftain, was not liked and was a not a nice person. He had some men loyal to him and a shaman. They were also feared.

Thanking her I left and continued to the castle, stopping only once more, at the brewery. I had been in many a bar and tavern but never in a brewery and I was curious. There were big metal vats and kettles. It was rather complicated looking and awe inspiring in the manner of certain Dwemer ruins. By that I mean I had no idea how it worked.

Some chitchat there with Borka, and his wife Gwenn, yielded more information: the people who actually lived in Lokken were not allowed to drink the mead, or at least not much of it. It was reserved for Ragnar Fire Hair and for his guests. What little they were allowed was at three times the price that guests paid. I was beginning to dislike this Ragnar and I had not even met him yet.

Thus forewarned, I approached and entered the castle.

I entered an anteroom of sorts. A guard was there. He said nothing but pointed to the door on the opposite side of the room. I nodded and went to the door.

I entered the throne room. There were animal pelts on the floor and tapestries on the walls to warm up the cold stone room and to provide an ambiance conducive to the hunting enthusiast. There was a bar on the left.

A bar in a throne room: that's not something I've seen before. Convenient I suppose if one were more concerned with entertaining than the usual duties of ruling. There were four guards; one on either side of the door I had just entered and two closer to the throne at the far end of the room.

The throne was on a raised section of the floor and on it sat a large mean-looking Nord with red hair who could only be Ragnar Fire Hair.

To his right stood a man in dark robes who had to be his shaman.

My boot steps were the only sound as I approached the throne. I presented the leaflet to Ragnar.

He tossed the leaflet aside and spoke: "Who the oblivion are you? You have no business being here uninvited and I'm sure I didn't invite you."

He paused and studied me. I stared back at him. I'm sure my eyes now had the hardness of obsidian as well as the color. I adjusted the angle of the sheath on my back.

He looked tough. And huge. A great bull of a man, and Nords are already kind of big. I wouldn't want to fight him, at least not alone.

"Well, you look like you can handle yourself in the wild. There is one way that perhaps you can be allowed in the forests."

I raised an eyebrow.

"I want you to hunt and kill a certain wolf. This is no ordinary wolf. It's larger than the regular snow wolves, though it is white like they are. It has unnatural blue eyes. My men and I have pursued it on numerous occasions and it has always gotten away."

"That's not something you see every day," I quipped. Oh Rashelle, you must stop this business of talking without thinking!

"Exactly. it is obviously not natural, not of the All-Maker. It is a daedra-spawn, an abomination, a menace that must be killed for the safety of my people," he said, not picking up on my sarcasm.

I nodded, not trusting myself to not again say something wrong, and to also buy myself a second or two of time to think of an appropriate response.

This man mentioning the All Maker rubbed me the wrong way: after my adventures amongst the Skaal I had some respect for their beliefs. I somehow knew that Ragnar had no right to call on their All Maker.

"So, oh chieftain of Lokken, so long as I Quest for this White Wolf, I am permitted in the forests of your island?"

"Aye, with my blessing. Bring me his head there will be a reward."

"I shall begin at once. First I will question the guards and villagers as to sightings."

"Excellent" he said, waving me away, obviously tired of talking to me now that I had agreed to his business.

I definitely did not like this man.

As I turned away I got a better look at his shaman and I liked him even less. My magical sensitivity picked up on an evil from him that I had previously only sensed from Sixth House minions. I tried not to display my feelings: a shaman is very sensitive and notices many things. Around him it would be best to appear to be a simple non-magical warrior and not a spellsword.

I strode away from the the throne. Before I took more than a few paces I could see that the woman at the bar was trying to get my attention with her eyes.

I sauntered over to the bar. Might not be a bad idea to get a mazte anyway. I cannot not stand mead. I love snow, but the Nords can keep their mead.

"I'm Kielreen"

"Rashelle. Got any mazte?"

"Yup".

"Please".

She poured me a mazte and started to speak very quietly. Not a whisper. That would have attracted attention, but she obviously wanted only me to hear.

"he's asked you about the big white wolf, wants you to kill it, right?"

I paid and took a sip before replying.

"Yes."

"Don't. There is something strange about the creature."

I took another sip.

"Things are not as they seem in Lokken."

That much was already obvious.

"Talk to my aunt Gwenn at the brewery."

I had just been there. Maybe mentioning Kielreen would get Gwenn to say more than she had the first time. I nodded ever so slightly. Picking up my drink, I walked to one of the one of Ragnars guards.

He at first did not want to speak but I can be charming when I want to be. I asked him about the white wolf and any sightings of it. This did not yield any new information but would go back to Ragnar and would keep him complacent about my activities. I had already decided that I was not going to kill this mysterious white wolf.

After talking to the the other guards I finished my mazte, left the mug on the bar and exited the castle. It had begun to snow. I caught some flakes in the palm of my hand and watched them melt.

Not a bad start, that's for sure. You've already put in several items that demand further exploration. First and foremost is the wolf of course. Next are Ragnar and his Shaman. Then there's the thing with the mead, could it be related to the white hair of some? Perhaps only the mead drinkers have colour in their hair, or perhaps not. Carry on, please.

Yay!! At last! I�ve been waiting for this great story to be posted here! You know I like it Blockie, so please
continue!

Pretty good, though I didn't read all of it (I was itching to respond, but I will go back and finish it in a second).

Just one thing, sometimes your discriptions will repeat themselves, or be rather bland. So instead of "Several people I saw had snow white hair: that was strange." Try something like. "Many of the residents had shockingly (Or "blindingly" if you prefer that) white hair, which was rather odd given the climate in which they lived."

While both might paint a picture of what you see in your mind, one is more extavagent and colorful, the other is basic and short. But sometimes basic and short is good, when you are writting a battle scene for instance, who would be taking note the color of the paint on the walls?

Aside from that, you are well on your way with this story. And seeing as I have never played this mod, I have no idea where you are going with it, and am thus much more interested in it (Also, one idea you could try is to add in a small quest, so as to add back story or something).

Sorry to drone on for so long, I will get back to reading it now.

EDIT: "It was rather complicated looking and awe inspiring in the manner of certain Dwemer ruins. By that I mean I had no idea how it worked." I love that line . Loved the sarcasm as well, keep up those funny lines and this story will go a long way.

I've caught myself repeating before. For me it's a problem ... I'm constantly having to watch for it. As for the blandness, that may work better for me: I find that the use of words ending in "ly" can cause more trouble than they are worth (for me anyway).

Replies like yours are why I wanted to post here. So I can learn and improve myself. Thank you.

Why would climate make white hair odd? Oh ... sun "bleaching" associated with tropical climates and/or summer. never mind

Thanks again for the detailed reply.

White Wolf Of Lokken Mountian is one of the best plugins ever. If you have Morrowind and the expansions, you should really try it. Emma writes NPCs with personality. You get attached to them. And Lokken has snow.

Again, a reminder (to all) that this story is a spoiler for the main quest of White Wolf Of Lokken Mountain.

Quests are coming. The back story appears in bits and pieces. You'll see.

I like to put as much humor as I can into things, yet in such a way that it does not detract from the pacing/plot/action/whatever. It's a balancing act. Nice to know I've managed it so far.

2.

The sun was about to set so it seemed to me the next order of business was to see about a meal and possibly to arrange lodging. On the way to the castle I had identified one of the larger buildings as the main hall so I now made my way there.

I opened the door and entered. I found myself in a room similar in appearance to that of the mead hall in Thirsk.

Two men and a woman were standing around a fire in the center of the room. The woman I guessed to be the barfly type. She was laughing. There were more people standing further away from the fire or seated at tables located against the wall. I could see at least two people with that white hair in the room.

I approached the group by the fire.

One of the men introduced himself as Karl.

He said: "The Lokken mead is really something special. May I buy a mug for you, and then we can have a chat?

"Ha! You are just planning to seduce an innocent girl like me!"

"Uuh? Me? Seducing you? I tell you what - here in Lokken, men don't seduce women. It's the women who seduce us. Now, if you aren't going to seduce me, you'd better leave, because then I will get seduced by someone else."

I nodded and walked away. I could hear him say; "Stephann - do you know what 'seducing' is?"

Trying hard not to smirk, I made my way to the bar in the back and arranged a room for the night. I expected I would only need the room for one night: tomorrow I would most likely be deep in my explorations and would sleep in a cave or something. I also ordered a meal.

In a short time I was at a small table in a dark corner, better able to see than be seen, eating. I was deciding if I wanted to explore a little bit that night, or just go to sleep right after my meal.

The woman I saw when I walked in, who I had pegged as a barfly, walked to my table and sat down next to me. This was unexpected. I looked at her and raised an eyebrow. She looked unhappy.

"Buy me a mead."

I chewed, swallowed, turned away from her and downed the rest of my mazte.

"Please".

Something was bothering her. She maybe wanted to talk about it. Perhaps this would be useful information.

I turned to her and nodded, then I got up and walked to the bar.

"One mead, and one mazte, please"

"She's had her quota of mead for this week."

"I realize that the mead is rationed for all but guests of Ragnar Fire Hair. I realize that everyone else has to pay three times as much for what little they get. The mead is for me, a guest of Ragnar Fire Hair. The mazte is for her", I said. She didn't believe me of course but it was enough to keep her off the hook with Ragnar.

She nodded and poured me two mugs. I paid, tipping her well, and returned to my table.

"Here is your mazte" I said as I placed the mug of mazte in front of me, "and my mead" I said as I placed the mug of mead in front of her, "now talk. First: who are you?".

She told me her name was Lisendra. She started on some random chitchat. Something was bothering her but she obviously was having trouble working herself up to it.

"Have you met Laurenna, the daughter of Wulfgar The White? She lives in her father's hunting cottage on the mountainside. Most of the time she just stands outside her cottage, staring at her old home. It's really spooky! I bet she misses her old lifestyle. Can't be easy for a 'lady' like her to live her life as a commoner. Actually, I'm grateful that I'm not a chieftain's daughter - I'd bet my life is a lot more exciting than Laurenna's. Hey, why don't you buy me another drink, and we can keep on talking,"

So I did. She drank it one gulp. Impressive in a disquieting way. My stomach cringed at the thought of that much mead hitting it all at once. I had been about to take another sip of my mazte but decided not to.

"Lokken used to be a lovely place. Wulfgar The White was a good chieftain, who cared for the Lokken villagers. We had his permission to hunt in the forests to make our living, and during bad years, he provided us with food. Sigrid, his wife, used to teach the village children how to read and write, and I often used to play with Wulfren. Well, sometimes also with Laurenna, but... I get along better with guys."

Oh, such a surprise.

As she continued I could indirectly build up a picture. Some sort of rivalry between her and this Laurenna. Apparently Lisendra had gone steady with Laurenna's brother, Wulfren, and then for reasons unclear had broken of the relationship. This obviously did not help matters between Laurenna and Lisendra.

It was now apparent that she had had more than a few drinks before approaching me.

"My life is a misery... hick... Did Laurenna say that I was a... hick... dreamy school girl? 'Tisn't true, you know... hick... I love this bloke... but I haven't seen him for a year. No-one has seen him for a year. They say he's a killer... hick... that he killed his own father. I don't believe them... hick... Oh, how I wish he was here! Then I would tell him how much I... hick... love him. But, I fear that I will never see him again... that he is dead. Hick."

Then she started to cry. This was an awkward moment. Here she was unburdening herself to a complete stranger about this man who was most likely no longer alive.

The main hall was silent but for her weeping. It was not my intent to become the center of attention. All I wanted was to eat a meal in peace. I sighed.

"OK, Lisendra", I said. "You've had too much. Time to go home."

I stood up, "Come on".

Still no one was saying anything.

"Can someone tell me where she lives?" I asked the room as I pulled her to a wobbling sort of standing position.

"First house to the left after you leave the hall" said Karl.

I nodded and we left.

She was still crying as we walked to her house.

A guard was watching as we reached Lisendra's house, so when I spelled the lock open I made it look like I was simply pushing an unlocked door open. The snow being like it is in Lokken, all doors opened inward.

I sat her on the bed.

"Thank you. I-I-I'm sorry" she said, still crying.

"So let me get this straight. You were in a relationship with Wulfren. Then blew him off, played around. Now he's gone and you wished you hadn't and that could be with him and him only".

"y-yes, I feel terrible. I wish I had stayed with him. I wish I could tell him I love him just one more time."

I tried not to be judgmental: it's not like they had been married or anything. The woman was obviously sincere in her regret. We all make mistakes.

I stayed with her a short while, just enough to make sure she was not going to be suicidal or anything like that. I put her to bed, told her to sleep on her side, arranged a wooden bucket by the bed just in case, and left.

I returned to the main hall. After chatting with Karl & the guys long enough to assure them that Lisendra was OK I went to my room.

In the morning I packed my things, left the room, and had a nice breakfast. They sure know how to cook in Lokken.

Ready for action, I left the main hall. The morning sunlight sparkled on the snow. It was really pretty.

I planned to walk around the village a little more, talking to whoever I had not already talked to, then I would hit the forests and explore, hopefully even find out the deal with this white wolf.

Paff!

Something cold and soft hit the side of my head. I put my hand to my head and felt ... snow? But it was a bright sunny morning with an amazingly clear Azure sky. Some new kind of weather?

"Tommy, you're in trouble now!", said a girls voice.

I turned and I could see some children playing in the snow between two buildings. A girl, whose voice I had just heard, started singing "Tommy's in trou-ble!"

One of the boys, presumably Tommy said, "We're sorry lady. Please don't tell."

I walked over to them and asked "what happened?"

They started laughing, even Tommy and the girl.

"He hit you with a snowball."

Remember that where I grew up there was no snow. So I had no idea what these children were talking about.

"A snow ball?"

"you know", said the girl, "like this".

She scooped up some of the snow, quickly patted it into a sphere, and threw it at Tommy, making a perfect head shot.

My eyes must have widened.

I crouched down and picked up some snow. I tried to press it into a ball. I succeeded but it took me longer than it had for her. I smiled.

"Oh wow. I had no idea you could do this."

They laughed.

"Children, where I grew up we had no snow."

"No way!"

"Way. Really."

I picked a tree trunk, threw my snowball and missed.

I made a second one and threw it. This time I hit the tree.

"Neat," I said "Thank you for showing me this new trick!"

"People always get mad when we do that. You're cool."

"Yeah, we like you! What's your name?"

"I'm Rashelle".

They all introduced themselves and I tried my best to keep all their names straight.

We had a snowball fight and we talked a bit about snow and about growing up in a land without snow. Kids see a lot of things so I got a lot of background on Lokken. Also I had a fun time. A guard looked disapprovingly at us at one point. Apparently I was supposed to be annoyed at the children.

They promised me they would not throw snowballs at adults, or at least not so often, and I went on my way.

I left the village and explored some of the wilderness. Truly some beautiful scenery and foliage, perhaps even more so than in the rest of Solstheim. As in Solstheim, I was attacked a few times by various creatures. All part of a normal day I guess.

Every one in a while I paused and threw a snowball at a rock or a tree. What a neat trick!

At one point in my wandering I found a woman by one of those Nordic burial tombs. She was by herself. Her name was Valkyriana and was distraught that her daughter, Hilde, had run off. She was afraid that Hilde had gone in the tomb.

As I entered the tomb I was certain that I would only find the child's dead body. These tombs were tough places, nothing like the Dunmer tombs in Vvardenfell.

As expected, there were draugr in there. Fighting more than two at a time is a challenge for me, but I had healing potions.

It was larger than the usual Nordic time and took a while to clear it of the numerous draugr and bone wolves in it. Somehow Hilde had managed to find her way into a distant back corner without being spotted by any of the undead. She was unhurt but understandably terrified.

I assured her that I had cleared the place out and that her mother was concerned and I then led her out of the tomb.

Mother and daughter were overjoyed to be reunited.

"Don't you ever do that again, I was worried sick about you".

They thanked me and I continued in my explorations.

I didn't find any oversized benevolent white wolves with blue eyes, just the usual snow wolf of the attacking kind.

It was nearing sunset and it had started to snow when I entered the village. I had previously planned to sleep in the wilderness but the thought of a warm meal amongst the villagers of Lokken drew me back.

I walked up and down the street, chatting with people and entering the few places I had not gone into yesterday.

"There she is Mommy, she's neat!" I heard a child's voice say in the distance.

People seemed much friendlier, more used to me I guess. The air of tension remained though. That reminded me of Fire Hair and his shaman and diminished my happy mood. That also reminded me that Kielreen at the castle yesterday had wanted me to chat with her aunt Gwenn at the brewery. I expected that I had a fairly complete picture of the situation now but I would talk to Gwenn again anyway.


--
edit: the phrase "dreamy school girl" was supplied by the auto-censor for the word I had intended. You get the idea.

This is a pretty good starting so far. An interesting concept indeed with this unusual dictatorship that seems to be encompassing this town. I just have the say that the very opening of the story kinda had me confused as you switched the points of view a couple of times before you got into Rashelle's narrative. I'm also not sure about whether or not the kid's dialect would consist of phrases of "Cool!" and "No Way!" in TES times, but that could be me just being nit-picky.

I certainly have enjoyed the perfectly placed sarcastic remarks provided by Rashelle; she is developing into a character that I'll enjoy reading about. Please continue when you can.

The only part intended to be "off" from first person was: "Thusly, the Nerevarine arrived at Lokken gawking and gaping like a tourist at the Imperial City." The intent here was a slight self-mockery on the part of Rashelle, referring to herself in the third person as she "speaks". I wanted to also establish that she was the Nerevarine already. I guess since I had to explain it I didn't pull it off. Hmmm. I'll have to think some more on that.

EDIT: I changed that bit. chapter 1 is all first person now. Works better this way. You were right. Thanks.

A deliberate shift to third person for one line will happen only once more, in a later "chapter". Hopefully it works better there.

As for the dialect, you are correct in that such phrases would not be used in the TES universe. I went the Xena/Hercules route for dialog: some dialog is 20th/2st century Earth slang.

It is interesting that Rashelle's little sarcastic thoughts/lines have been remarked on twice already. This is unexpected, but not unwelcome. Rest assured that there is more to Rashelle then just sarcasm.

I was thinking along the lines of the fact that most civilizations had dyes of some sort or another, and might have known that darker hair keeps heat in better then white. Plus, if they had lived there for a few thousand years, their hair might have started to come in darker, regardless of genes. Adaptation you know.

I haven't had time to read the second part (My laptop is having a disagreement with the internet, and is refusing to speak with it ), but I will tonight if I can settle this argument.

Based on the critiques so far, I have made changes to chapter 1. These corrected bits seem to flow better. It is entirely in first person now. Thanks guys. this is why I posted it here: for the quality and detailed feedback.

Better still, in a properly ruthless editing mode, I've gone through the chapters that have not yet been posted and fixed some things. I suppose it is silly to refer to sections of a short story as chapters but I find it convenient to do so.

Once more I should note here that this story is a spoiler for Emma's most excellent White Wolf Of Lokken Mountain plugin. If you have not yet played that plugin but think that you may at some point, you might want to put off reading this story.

That said, here we go ...


--
3. Commitment

After entering the brewery I again approached Gwenn.

"Kielreen at the castle said I should speak to you concerning the white wolf".

That's me, subtle as an atronach.

This time Gwenn was much more talkative. I'm not not sure if it was my mention of Kielreen, my honest face (stop laughing, you) or simple desperation.

Much of what she told me I had already heard in one form or another but as I listened I had the suspicion that I was somehow getting a more direct and accurate version.

The white wolf was not a regular snow wolf. It was larger and behaved unlike a wolf, seeming to be trying to help people rather than harm them. The blue eyes were not a fiction on Ragnar's part. This last part was interesting because it brought a nagging half memory to my mind, something from my magical studies. I would have to think on this later and dredge that memory up because I suspected it was important.

The wolf had first been sighted in the mountains a year ago, shortly after the death of Wulfgar The White. Some believed that the wolf had been sent by the gods to protect them from Ragnar Fire Hair, but a week ago the wolf seemed to have disappeared. Two of Ragnar's men claimed to have injured the wolf with poisoned arrows so it was possible that it was dead.

Wulfgar had been the previous chieftain and had been loved by the people. Ragnar was only the step-brother of Wulfgar, and therefore not really the rightful ruler. The villagers were in fear of him and his men too much to do anything about it.

In order to legitimize his position, Ragnar would need to marry the widow of the previous chieftain. This woman was named Sigrid and she refused to marry Ragnar. For this, Ragnar had imprisoned her in the castle, in one of the towers, leaving her there until she changed her mind.

The day Wulfgar was killed, his son, Wulfren The White, disappeared. Fire Hair claimed that Wulfren had murdered his father and gone into hiding. No one believed that, but they did believe that Wulfren was now dead. Exit one man; enter one white wolf.

Gwenn had explained a lot to me, yet she had more to say.

"Wulfgar's sister, Laurenna, was thrown out of the castle and is now living in her father's old hunting cottage. She believes that Wulfren is somehow still alive and that he is innocent. She has taken to cutting her hair short, and has sworn a vow by the gods not to let it grow until Wulfren is in his rightful place as the chieftain of Lokken."

I nodded. I find the less I speak, the more other people want to speak. I get more information this way.

"You can see her sometimes, even at night, standing there just so that her mother can see her from the tower. You should talk to her. She would explain better."

I would do that next, if only because she was just about the only one around here that I had not yet spoken to.

Gwenn paused.

"One other thing, Rashelle."

I raised an eyebrow.

"Laurenna is a country girl, more comfortable in the forests than among people. She is shy with strangers. She's never left Lokken."

I grinned and said "Tell the bad scary Breton with the big sword not to spook the locals, I gotcha."

That got a laugh from her.

"Pass the castle, going to the right. Follow the corner of the castle left to get behind the castle. Walk a little along the back and then look for a path going up on your right. That will take you to Laurenna's cottage".

I nodded and left.

The sky began to darken into twilight: the sun must have set while I was inside talking to Gwenn.

I walked up to the castle and turned to the right. This took me along one side and then the rear of the castle. The gradually darkening blue light of twilight, combined with the falling snow, made a truly beautiful and magical atmosphere. I could walk through this forever. Truly Lokken was a wonderland, or would be if not for the oppressive tension in the air.

In a short time I found the upward path from the castle to Laurenna's cottage and ascended it.

It turned right. After a few paces the path reached a sort of plateau. There were snow-covered trees to the left of the path. To the left of the trees, the mountain rose steeply. To the right was a log and a long drop down. This gave a view down to the castle.

And there she was.

She held a glass lantern in one hand and was facing the castle. Past where she stood and to the left, partially obscured by some snow covered trees, I could just make out part of a small cottage. She wore one of those heavy woolen robes that were often necessary in these colder climates.

She wore a sword but since it hung on her left side I could not identify what kind it was.

Her hair was that shocking snow white that I had seen on some of the other inhabitants of Lokken. It was cut very short, as Gwenn had described.

I stopped. The snow continued to fall. The light of her lantern caught the snow flakes near her, creating a sphere of light around her. She was there like a beacon, a lighthouse to guide a weary traveler. Or to cheer an imprisoned mother.

I cleared my throat so as not to startle her: I walk silently even in heavy armor so I know she had not yet noticed me. I then resumed walking towards her.

Of course, like all Nords, she was taller than I am. She had a pretty face and that short hair looked rather attractive, once one got used to the unusual coloring. I wondered how that hair style would look on me.

I reached her. She turned her head to me. Her eyes were blue.

She spoke: "Hello, stranger. I assume you are one of Ragnar Fire Hair's so called 'guests', and that you are here to hunt down some of our beautiful wild animals. Don't let me interrupt you. I'm sure you have better things to do than talking to me."

I was taken aback. I had not expected this. But then again, what should I have expected, that Gwenn would send a bird with a note clearing the way for me during the short time it took me to walk here?

"Laurenna, I am not here to hunt. I want to help. Gwenn has told me of your situation and wanted me to talk to you."

"This is not your concern."

"There is evil in the castle. I have no intention of killing the wolf. I need to talk to you."

"Go away, Outlander," she said ... with more venom than any Dunmer had ever before managed.

She turned away, facing the castle again. She ignored my further attempts at conversation. As far as she was concerned, I was not there. I had the strong feeling that I could stand there for hours and she still would not speak.

The sky was continuing to darken: it was deep into twilight.

She was in a desperate situation and could not afford to trust me, a total stranger. As a stranger I had no ties here, no reason to be trusted: I could make an empty promise and then just leave. Her attitude, while annoying, was logical.

I had to admire her tenacity, her dedication, and her loyalty. It took all of that to maintain this lonely vigil day after day. One could only admire these qualities, even as one was being stymied by them.

I wanted to help her. I wanted to make things right in Lokken.

I had already talked to the entire village. There was no one else to talk to and I needed information. I had searched part of the forest today and had not found the wolf. I could keep searching but it could take a long time. If the wolf had been hit by poisoned arrows, time was running out. Laurenna's cooperation was the only way I could help Lokken. I needed a way to convince her of my sincerity.

I tried to think.

Laurenna's short hair was pretty. I had the thought that I should try it some time. The last time I had short hair was when I was a child on the run and I lived for some time disguised as a boy. Now that I was older and fully developed, the short hair might actually accentuate my femininity rather than mask it.

Then the idea hit me. I sat down on the snow.

My hair was not styled in any sophisticated way: just pulled back into a sort of pony tail with a strip of cloth tied around it. Since my hair is straight, not much curl to it, that's all it ever needed to stay out of my face and look good. I untied the cloth.

I took a breath, paused, released it. Focus, Rashelle.

But I was already committed. I was really committed when I first met Ragnar and his shaman. Also, while it may sound silly, the people here in Lokken had already charmed me. If I left now, leaving that Evil here, I would not be able to live with myself.

No more thinking. Act.

I bunched up my hair in one hand and pulled out my silver dagger with the other and slashed.

I cast the hair at her feet.

She looked down at the hair and then at me and her eyes widened. I looked up at her silently while cutting more of my hair off.

It took another minute or so to finish the job. I had to bend my head down when I neatened up the edge on the back of my neck. Not being able to see myself, I had to feel my head to get the lengths right. I eventually had what I knew was a close approximation of the cut she had.

I blew the hairs off of my dagger and sheathed it. I looked up at her again. I had her full attention now.

"Laurenna, you have sworn to the gods that you will not let your hair grow long again until Wulfren has taken his place as chieftain. I, too, swear this to your gods and I swear this to Azura and I swear this to you."

She extended her hand. I grasped it and pulled myself up until I was standing.

Twilight came to a close.

"Laurenna, I am Rashelle. I spoke to Gwenn at the Brewery. I know your mother is locked away in the castle. I know Wulfren, your brother, is the rightful chieftain and that he is missing. Ragnar Fire Hair and his shaman are very evil. I suspect the white wolf is the key to the whole matter and that he is in peril right now. I want to help. My sword and spells are at your service. Tell me what to do."

Ahh, good as ever Blockie! I especially liked the scene when Rashelle just cut off her long hair! Oh my how often I wish I had the courage of doing the same!

Things are moving along rather nicely in this update. I find Rashelle's way of earning Laurenna's trust to be very unique. I also have some interesting speculations of what might this great white wolf might be. I'll eagerly anticipate the rest of this story to see if I'm correct. Keep it up!

4. Test

Laurenna explained the situation to me as we stood in the falling snow, she with the lantern so that her mother could see her.

"Ragnar threw me out of the castle because he thinks that it is my fault that Mother refuses to marry him. What nonsense."

She continued; "Mother won't marry him because he's a murdering swine. She and I know that he killed my father but we can't prove it."

She told me that she used to see the wolf quite often until a week ago. It seemed to visit Laurenna every day, as if it had a particular interest in her welfare.

"I fear that Ragnar's hunters have wounded the wolf with their poison arrows as they have claimed. Oh I wish I could look for him but I have to stay here. My mother would become frantic if she didn't see me here."

"Laurenna, you can't ever not stand here?"

"I stop to sleep at night. And I stop for meals and to get food & supplies, but only at certain times. I have to keep on a regular schedule. If I break it, she'll think something has happened to me. She might give in and marry Ragnar. She can't do that! I can't stop."

"Very well, I will start looking right now."

"Wait", she said, "You won't find anything in this snow now. In about an hour I'll be done. Wait with me for now and then later come in and we can eat."

That made sense. Also I suspected she was just craving company. The lifestyle of a hermit does not agree with everyone.

We stood there for the hour, talking. Laurenna told me of her life and her experiences growing up. I told her much about myself. It was as if we were old friends catching up, rather than two people who had just met.

Laurenna showed me the window in the tower where her mother was imprisoned. I could not really see in the window at this distance: Laurenna's eyes were sharper than mine. Perhaps in clearer weather I would see better.

Then she was done.

Just before I went inside I cast a Mark spell near the cottage, yet not in line of site of the castle. I suspected this would be the center of operations for the next few days.

We ate and then she trimmed my new hair style a bit neater. She said I could sleep here and pointed to a corner where I could place my sleeping fur.

We breakfasted at dawn.

"Rashelle, I have had an idea. My old friend Fjorngrin may know of the wolf's whereabouts. At least he can help you with the search. He lives in a house in the wilderness, away from the village. He's not very talkative and is rather suspicious of strangers, even more so than I am."

"I'm not cutting my arm off just to talk with him."

She laughed.

"I know an easier way to gain his trust. Years ago on a hunting trip, my father approached a frost boar that he thought he had just killed with a spear. Turns out the beast was not dead and it upped and gored him in the butt."

She smiled and chuckled, temporarily back in happier days.

"He was OK afterwards. For years after, all anyone had to say to make any of us laugh was 'frost boar tusk in the butt.'"

"So I tell him 'frost boar tusk in the butt' and he will know that you sent me?"

She nodded.

She gave me directions and we were off: she to her vigil and I to Fjorngrin's place. It was sunny now: the snow had stopped sometime during the night. The landscape was just incredible. Of course something attacked me but it was nothing I wasn't used to from my time in Solstheim. Soon I reached Fjorngrin's house.

I knocked on the door and a man answered. From the bloodshot eyes and the general unhealthy look I could tell that he had been drinking the night before. Looking past him I could see the place was a bit of a mess.

"Are you Fjorngrin?"

He winced.

"Aye, but can you not speak so loud?"

"I'm Rashelle. Laurenna sent me. May I come in?"

He let me in and waved me to a chair. He pulled up a crate.

"So what can I do for you?"

"I need to find the big white wolf with the blue eyes."

"Do you now?" he said in a wary tone.

I nodded.

"So how do I know that Laurenna really sent you?"

"Laurenna says 'frost boar tusk in the butt.'"

He smiled and chuckled.

"I guess she did."

I waited.

"But that's not enough. She may trust you and that's got some weight to it but I don't trust you."

I looked down at the floor and put my hands on the back of my head. I'd now have to do some stupid quest. Maybe find some Dwemer tubes, or fetch him a Telvanni bride, or maybe get him some muck! No, it would be pillows. pillows? Pillows! I almost started to giggle. Focus Rashelle. Focus.

I took a breath and forced some calm.

I released the breath, looked up again and said, "What would you have me do to convince you?"

"Yesterday I was guiding this silly Imperial, one of Ragnar's 'guests'. He was exclaiming his prowess at hunting though it was obvious to me he had never done it before. He wore a fur hat that had been dyed a ridiculous bright yellow. Still, he paid well and I guided him through the woods for some time. Oddly enough we did not run into any animals. That's just as well considering his lack of experience. He was a city-born idiot but we were getting along well so I invited him here for supper. Then we got to drinking."

I nodded. As noted before, the less I speak, the more other people speak.

"I eventually passed out. Well, near as I can tell he sneaked out in the middle of the night, taking with him my long bow and my snow bear trophy. The trophy is a snow bear head stuffed and mounted on a wooden plaque. I assume he wants to take them back to Cyrodiil and convince everyone there that he actually went hunting and killed something.

"Rashelle, find him. Get my bow. Get the plaque as well if you can but the bow is more important. Do this and then we can talk. With that silly bright yellow hat he should be easy to find."

I stood up.

"Right. I'm on it."

After walking out of the house, I looked for tracks in the snow. I could see my tracks clearly, as they had been made just a few moments ago. The Imperial's tracks would have been made while it was still snowing so would be partially covered up.

Then I saw them. Heading west. I followed.

I was feeling anger. I was not angry at Fjorngrin for giving me this task. I was angry at the Imperial thief. Now I've done some thieving in my time; I was starving and had to. The Imperial was pilfering just to build up a lie of his own hunting prowess. That is what bothered me. Also, when Fjorngrin invited the Imperial into his home it was a trust. To then steal from Fjorngrin was a betrayal of that trust.

If this "silly Imperial" was as ineffectual as Fjorngrin had said, he would not have gone very far so I would find him soon. The tracks faded in and out, as the wind had piled up the snow into drifts here and there.

Here I could see where he started running. Two sets of tracks that were probably wolves joined his tracks.

Very soon I found the Imperial. I was surprised to find him alive. He was standing on a large rock outcrop, being menaced by two wolves who could not climb the rock. I dispatched them and called him down. He had the bow but not the snow bear plaque.

He climbed down and started to say "Oh, thank you, I ... "

"Shut up."

He gaped.

"Give me the bow."

"I was only ... "

"Shut up."

He gave me the bow.

I handed him an Almsivi Intervention potion: I had no intention of escorting him out of here myself.

"This will take you to the Dunmer Temple in Gnisis. Use it now."

"Dunmer? Ewww. Those stupid weird savages."

So he was a bigot as well as thief. People like him were the reason the Dunmer hated outlanders so much. It took all of my willpower not to deck the s'wit. I'm sure I was trembling with rage.

"Respect the Dunmer, sera!" I hissed. "Have you lived with the Ashlanders? Have you taken the pilgrimage of the Seven Graces? Speak not of what you know nothing!"

He looked like he was going to say more. I cracked my knuckles. My eyes dared him to speak.

"Take the potion now, Outlander, while you still can."

He drank it and was gone.

I took a few breaths to calm myself down.

I had just called someone an outlander. I had never done that before. I had always been the outlander. What had just happened?

I found the snow bear head plaque on the way back to Fjorngrin's place.

When I returned, he saw what I was holding and said "Ahhh Rashelle, you've brought my bow and also the plaque. Thank you."

I sat down on a crate.

"Was the Imperial still alive when you found him?", he asked.

"Surprisingly, yes. I gave the s'wit an Intervention potion and he's now on his way back home."

"Rashelle, while you were gone I have been thinking. When Wulfgar was still alive, Snorri was his shaman. He may not have been the most able of shamen but he is a good man. When Ragnar took over, Snorri left the castle. He told me he was afraid of Ragnar's shaman."

"With good reason," I interrupted.

He raised an eyebrow. Wait a minute ... wasn't I supposed to do that?

I continued. "I have some training and ... sensitivities ... in the areas of magic. That man radiates dark magic. He's evil. And he has power. He is dangerous. I'm sorry to interrupt. Please go on."

"Well," he continued, "Snorri and I still stay in touch from time to time. He now lives in the unfrozen eastern area of Lokken island."

I raised an eyebrow. That's better.

"It hardly snows there for some reason. At any rate, he has a hideout there someplace. I have not seen it myself but Snorri has mentioned that it is a cave and that the entrance is very well hidden between two stone blocks."

I nodded.

"Like myself, and like Laurenna, Snorri won't trust you. I have no ideas on getting though to him. Perhaps Laurenna can think of something. I think you should talk to her."

I nodded. That made sense. I rose to leave.

"Rashelle?"

I raised an eyebrow.

"Why are you doing this?"

I looked away.

"I swore a vow."

He remained silent. I had not answered his question.

"I want to remove the evil in the castle. That shaman radiates a cloud of black evil and Ragnar Fire Hair is a thug. Wulfren is the rightful chieftain. Somehow the white wolf is the key to this matter."

Everything I said was true, yet he remained silent.

I looked him straight in the eyes.

"I do this for Laurenna."

He nodded.

I left.

I like the humour and self-critiscizing in your work. You've got a wonderful personality built in Rashelle which really means a lot in most stories.

And the yellow hat, could it be a Colovian Fur Hat? I love those things, they're so comfy! (Though I'm still wondering why the Fighter's guild supply chests in Morrowind stored those things. I would've expected a real helmet or something.)

5. Ghost, Wolf

I Recalled to my Mark outside of Laurenna's house. I approached her and related what had occurred.

"I don't know where Snorri is so you'll just have to search for Snorri's hideout using Fjorngrin's description."

I nodded.

"However, I have an easy solution for convincing Snorri that you are my friend. Go to my father's tomb and fetch Gunna's amulet from the coffin. Bring that with you and show it to Snorri. That should do it."

"Where is your father's tomb?"

"Right there in my cottage."

I raised an eyebrow.

She smiled and continued. "There is a secret trap door in the back wall, covered by a tapestry."

"Nice. I'll be right back."

While convenient, I thought it was a strange burial arrangement. But then again, these were abnormal times in Lokken. As long as it didn't disturb Laurenna's sleep I guess it was fine.

I entered the cottage. I lifted the tapestry up and saw the door. I opened it and found myself in a tunnel hewn through the rock. It sloped gently downwards. After a few yards, the rock gave through to an ice strata. I continued down and soon found myself at the end of the tunnel.

Wulfgar's Stalhrim coffin was there. Interesting: I didn't know that anyone still had the ancient formula for making Stalhrim. Elsewhere in Solstheim they told me that it had been lost forever. Inside the transparent coffin was the body, perfectly preserved. He was dressed in a set of Nordic Mail armor, all but the helm. He had white hair. Outside the coffin were some more pieces of armor, an axe, some gems & unidentifiable trinkets and a Nordic mail helm.

I didn't search for Gunna's amulet because in front of the the coffin stood the semi-transparent form of Wulfgar's ghost. I knew it was Wulfgar because the face of the ghost matched the face of the man inside the Stalhrim.

Without thinking, I said "Frost boar tusk in the butt".

The ghost chuckled.

"I see Laurenna has not forgotten".

I nodded. I didn't know what to say next. Why hadn't Laurenna mentioned the tiny detail that her father's ghost was here?

"Don't look so scared! I may be a ghost, but I'm not here to harm you. Instead, I want you to listen to me."

I nodded.

"I am Wulfgar The White, father of Laurenna and Wulfren, former chieftain of Lokken. I love this island, I love each villager living here and every animal in the forests. And I love my wife and my children. It makes me so sad to see the pain Sigrid and Laurenna are going through, and it raises my wrath to know that Wulfren has been falsely accused of having slain me.

"Wulfren is innocent. The man who thrust the sword into my heart was my own step-brother, Ragnar, the man who calls himself the new chieftain of Lokken. I don't know what has happened to my son, but I can feel that he is alive. If you care for Laurenna, if you care for the Lokken people, please try to find Wulfren. Only he could oppose Ragnar and claim his place as the rightful ruler of Lokken.

"Ragnar is a man of considerable power. I doubt that anyone could slay him with normal powers. But, with the war-hammer of Thorjan Bjorg, Wulfren might be able to defeat him. This incredible weapon is hidden in the tomb of Thorjan Bjorg. But, you cannot just pick up the warhammer and walk away with it. To get the strength to handle it, you also need Thorjan's gauntlets. And it is pointless to look for the tomb of Thorjan Bjorg without the gauntlets. Only when you have found them, you will find the tomb.

"My friend, I will leave you now. Please, feel free to use my weapons and armor. You might have use for them in the dangerous forest. I suggest that you try to locate my shaman, Snorri, who is hiding in the forest. He might know the truth about Wulfren's whereabouts. Bring Gunna's amulet - you'll find it on my coffin. Then, he will know that you are a friend. Don't tell Laurenna that you have met me. I don't want her to get upset. May the Gods bless you, my friend.

And he faded away.

I felt sad. He seemed like a nice man.

I located and picked up the only amulet I could see so I guess it had to be Gunna's amulet. I picked up the the helm and looked it over. It was a fine-looking piece of gear but I don't like to wear a helm unless I have to. I can hear an approaching stealthy attack better without a helm.

As I set down the helm an alarming thought occurred to me. Ragnar, his shaman, and most everyone in the village had seen me with long hair. Now I had very short hair, the identical cut to Laurenna. I might as well have donned the Anti Ragnar Club uniform. The next time he saw me Ragnar would put two and two together and would throw me off the island or possibly even just try to have me imprisoned or killed. I could avoid these last two but then I would not be able to help anyone in Lokken. Even if he did nothing to me, I'd be watched, hampered in my efforts. Bad things would happen to people I spoke to. To Laurenna.

A cast of an Almsivi Intervention spell and I was teleported to Gnisis.

At the Imperial Legion fort I procured an Imperial steel helm. It was an open helm, which I prefer over a closed helm. I could have gone to my house and gotten a better helm but I didn't want to take that much time. While there, I obtained some extra alchemy ingredients and some additional armor repair tools.

This activity helped me to settle down from my encounter with Wulfgar's ghost. I had encountered Undead who talked instead of attacking in the past, but it was still something I was not entirely used to.

Upon leaving the fort I bought some spices and ash yams and other Vvardenfell vegetables for Laurenna. I imagined her diet had been monotonous of late because of limited foraging & hunting time.

I cast Recall, walked over to Laurenna and showed her the amulet.

"Yes, that's the one. Where did you get that helm?"

"Quick jaunt to Gnisis" I said, "I have to hide my short hair from Ragnar and his men."

"Ohh, good point, but my fathers helm is a lighter and stronger construction than that thing."

"Yes, and recognizable as your father's helm. That would raise questions."

"Oops."

"I brought you some spices and different food and stuff for you. I'll just drop them in the cottage and then I'm off to find Snorri. If I'm not around for dinner don't wait. I might be in the middle of following up a lead on the wolf or your brother."

She nodded.

I must admit that despite the urgency of the matter, I had great fun romping around more of Lokken. The east coast was green, as I had been told, but still with the foliage I associated with colder areas. It was pretty.

I encountered two-legged animals in addition to the expected local beasts. Some were reavers, who seemed to roam most of Solstheim. Some were of a different sort. They wore full Nordic Mail armor yet fought with a peculiar ferocity that I associate only with madmen and berserkers. They were tough. I had to quaff potions.

Laurenna had mentioned something about Lokken berserkers being different from regular berserkers in that they wore armor and were tougher. These must have been what I encountered.

I had gone past the entrance to Snorri's hideout several times before I finally recognized it as an entrance. It was a hole between two rocks yet also set back behind some bushes.

I wanted to do this carefully; not spook anyone. I called in before entering: "Hello, I am Rashelle, a friend of Laurenna. I would like to come in and speak to Snorri."

I heard nothing.

"I don't hear anything. I am coming in. Please do not be alarmed. I will leave if asked."

I entered, slowly, making as much noise as I could.

I was in a narrow cavern.

"I am looking for Snorri," I called out.

Making my armor clank as loudly as possible, I walked. The cavern bent to the right then to the left. I came into a chamber lit by torches. There were stairs up to a wooden platform and on the platform stood a man.

"Are you Snorri?"

"Yes I am, but who are you?"

I took off my helm. The thing was hot.

"I am Rashelle. Laurenna sent me."

I approached the stairs and held out Gunna's amulet.

"She told me to show you this."

"Gunna's amulet," he said. "What can I do for you?"

"I need to find the White Wolf." No beating about the bush, me, no sera.

"He's here but he is in bad shape from poisoned arrows."

"I have healing potions."

"They won't work on a wolf."

"Oh."

"I can't leave him here alone but if you could go to Granny Torunn for me I believe she would be able to make a cure poison potion for a wolf."

"I don't know her," I said. "Where does she live? In the village?"

"No; she lives in the wilderness, not far from Fjorngrin's house. Do you know him?"

I nodded.

He gave me directions relative to Fjorngrin's house. I thanked him, put my helm back on, and then departed silently.

The sun was setting when I reached Granny Torunn's house.

I knocked on the door and an older Nord woman answered. This made me fairly sure I had the right place.

"I am Rashelle. Are you Granny Torunn?"

"Yes, I am. What brings you here?"

"Snorri told me you might be able to make a healing potion for a large white wolf that has been injured by poisoned arrows."

"Not ... that wolf?"

"Yes," I answered, "that wolf. He is safely hidden but is doing badly."

She invited me in and paced for a minute or two. I relaxed on a chair and absently studied her alchemy equipment.

She spoke: "I think I can do it and I have most of the ingredients. The only thing I require are two wolf pelts. Not snow wolf, but regular wolf. If you could get those for me then we will be all set."

"Right. I'm on it."

Twilight turned to darkness as I roamed through the woods. Moonlight on snow covered ground is so magical. Eventually I found two wolves. I brought the pelts back to Granny Torunn. She said they were perfect.

In a surprisingly short time she had made a potion of Cure Poison formulated for wolves. That woman knew her alchemy!

"Untested, obviously", she said, "but I expect it will work."

Payment was not mentioned. I thanked her and returned with the potion to Snorri's.

"Thank you Rashelle; now hopefully we can save the wolf," he said after I had given him the potion.

"Now Rashelle," he said, "this may take awhile and I must not be disturbed. Could you come back in the daytime tomorrow?"

I nodded and left. I was a little miffed but would get over it. I stepped out of his hideout. I cast Recall. Laurenna had already gone inside for the night. I did not enter Laurenna's cottage. I had things to do. I was not going to sleep just yet, if at all, that night. Silently I walked down the path, towards the castle.

You're setting up quite a frantic pace here blockhead. I'm surprised Rashelle isn't exhausted from all the travelling she's been doing. All the same I've enjoyed these last couple of updates, particularlly the fact that you say Rashelle focuses on listening. Makes me feel like I'm playing the game when you refer to it like that; it's very "Nerevarineish".

Sheesh! I stay one weekend at my moms, and you updated this five times! (I am counting the redone versions of the first two chapters) Oh well, it is all good, and I especially like how you went over your old stuff and made it better. Much, much better. Keep it up!

EDIT: I am reading your new updates now, and I must say, so far I am loving your sense of humor in this Fiction! "That's me, subtle as an atronach," is my favorite line so far, closly followed by, "my honest face (stop laughing, you)."

The plot is getting much better now, and I am starting to really wonder about it. Perhaps the wolf is Wulfgar whom was bitten by a Werewolf, or maybe the gods created it as an act of revenge (If Wulfgar was murdered, or maybe because Ragnar is not the true leader) against Ragnar.

"Gwenn had certainly just explained a lot to me. She had a little bit more to say," might be better of with, "Although Gween had just explained a great deal to me, she still had more to say." The way it was before doesn't really flow well, and seemed strange in a story where everything flows properly. I find that saying what you type aloud will help finding out if it flows from one sentence to another. And keep in mind, if I give you an example sentence, I am using words that I like, but you may not particulally care for. Feel free to swap out any words you don't like if you follow my suggestions.

Also, you could try posting a sentence or section you are having trouble with and get our advice.

"Tell the bad scary Breton with the big sword not to spook the locals, I gotcha," has now taken the place of favorite line in thie chapter.

"She turned her head to me. Her eyes were blue," perhaps, "She turned, and looked right at me with her deep, blue eyes." Just a thought.

That was a very well writen scene at the end, possably your best yet! On to chapter four!

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"I'm not cutting my arm off just to talk with him," best so far in this chapter!

"frost boar tusk in the butt," takes the lead!

"Of course something attacked me but it was nothing I wasn't used to from my time in Solstheim," I was expecting something like, "Of course an animal or two decided to commit suicide by Rashelle, but after the time I spent in Solstheim, I could easly handle it." It is strange not seeing sarcasm in this story...

"I'd now have to do some stupid quest. Maybe find some Dwemer tubes, or fetch him a Telvanni bride, or maybe get him some muck! No, it would be pillows. pillows? Pillows! I almost started to giggle. Focus Rashelle. Focus." Nice references to Morrowind there!

"He wore a fur hat that had been dyed a ridiculous bright yellow." And another!

"Then I saw them. Heading west. I followed." Try to avoid sentences like these, as I stated before, it just doesn't flow well. Plus it is not very discriptive, and doesn't look like something experienced writer would write (I am assuming you are either experienced or natually talented, or both).

"Respect the Dunmer, sera!" I hissed. "Have you lived with the Ashlanders? Have you taken the pilgrimage of the Seven Graces? Speak not of what you know nothing!" Very nice! Loved the Dunmer words and curses. And I certaintly know what Rashelle is feeling...

Aside from your short, undiscripive bullect statments, this chapter is very good! Just try to work on those bullet sentances okay?

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Quick question. Could you PM me the link to where I can download this mod? You really sparked my interest in it.

But onto the chapter itself. I like how you left out the " at the end of the paragraphs if someone is still talking, newbies would probably but it in there, so thus, you must not be a newbie. Nice to know you are learned in the ways of Grammer and Punctuation.

"I might as well have donned the Anti Ragnar Club uniform." Nothing to say about this but .

"No beating about the bush, me, no sera." A compliment and criticism here. While I loved the sentence, you forgot the "for". Not a writing mistake, just a typing one

Again, more bullet statements, try to avoid those and you will do great. Keep up the good work!

P.S. Sorry about the wall of text.

[quote name='Zelda_Zealot' date='Apr 2 2007, 05:01 PM' post='95035']
Sheesh! I stay one weekend at my moms, and you updated this five times! (I am counting the redone versions of the first two chapters) Oh well, it is all good, and I especially like how you went over your old stuff and made it better. Much, much better. Keep it up!
[/quote]
Yes, I wanted the feedback so I could make this a better story. That's why I'm here.

[quote]
"Gwenn had certainly just explained a lot to me. She had a little bit more to say," might be better of with, "Although Gween had just explained a great deal to me, she still had more to say." The way it was before doesn't really flow well, and seemed strange in a story where everything flows properly. I find that saying what you type aloud will help finding out if it flows from one sentence to another. And keep in mind, if I give you an example sentence, I am using words that I like, but you may not particulally care for. Feel free to swap out any words you don't like if you follow my suggestions.[/quote]
For whatever reason chapter one and two were hard to write. I think over the entire project, those two have been edited / tweacked / fussed with the most. Things picked up after those two. I don't know why.

[quote]
Also, you could try posting a sentence or section you are having trouble with and get our advice.
[/quote]
Yes, that is good to know ... keep in mind I originally wrote this before I was on chorrol.

[quote]
"She turned her head to me. Her eyes were blue," perhaps, "She turned, and looked right at me with her deep, blue eyes." Just a thought.
[/quote]
No offense but that way reads like a romance novel.

[quote]"frost boar tusk in the butt," takes the lead![/quote]
That line is from Emma's plugin. I can't take credit for that.

[quote]"Then I saw them. Heading west. I followed." Try to avoid sentences like these, as I stated before, it just doesn't flow well. Plus it is not very discriptive, and doesn't look like something experienced writer would write (I am assuming you are either experienced or natually talented, or both).[/quote]
Your advice has been very good and very helpful but this bit I'm not sure I agree with. Is there a need to describe footprints? Or snow (which has been previously covered in chapter 1)? In the past, writing descriptions bogged me down. For this story I have deliberately followed a lean and minimal approach. Maybe I'm just not understanding what you mean.

Dude ... I am such a beginner at writing it isn't funny. I've tried to write stuff on and off for years and never had results like this story before. This is the first the first thing I ever actually finished!

[quote]
"Respect the Dunmer, sera!" I hissed. "Have you lived with the Ashlanders? Have you taken the pilgrimage of the Seven Graces? Speak not of what you know nothing!" Very nice! Loved the Dunmer words and curses. And I certaintly know what Rashelle is feeling...
[/quote]
Whew. Good. I had some trouble with that line. Took me awhile to get it right. In an earlier draft she didn't even say anything: she just slugged him. I thought that was too brutal so I changed it.

[quote]
Aside from your short, undiscripive bullect statments, this chapter is very good! Just try to work on those bullet sentances okay?
[/quote]
Darn .. I was kind of getting into them. They seem very effective. For example: look at the last five lines of chapter 4. I don't think that would have worked as well with longer sentences.

[quote]
Quick question. Could you PM me the link to where I can download this mod? You really sparked my interest in it.
[/quote]
No need to PM. I'll put it here for all to see. Everyone should go play this plugin. It's one of the greatest plugins ever. Emma rocks. She makes the NPCs seem like real people.

• White Wolf Of Lokken Mountain: <a href="http://lovkullen.net/Emma/lokken.htm" target="_blank">http://lovkullen.net/Emma/lokken.htm</a>
• Emma's site (she has other plugins): <a href="http://lovkullen.net/Emma/index.htm" target="_blank">http://lovkullen.net/Emma/index.htm</a>
• Emma's forums (go here and tell her how great WWOLM is) : <a href="http://forums.elricm.com/emma/index.php" target="_blank">http://forums.elricm.com/emma/index.php</a>

[quote]
But onto the chapter itself. I like how you left out the " at the end of the paragraphs if someone is still talking, newbies would probably but it in there, so thus, you must not be a newbie. Nice to know you are learned in the ways of Grammer and Punctuation.
[/quote]
WHEW. I wasn't sure about that. My grammar is a mix of dim memories from school, winging it and dumb luck ... with emphasis on the dumb.

[quote]
"No beating about the bush, me, no sera." A compliment and criticism here. While I loved the sentence, you forgot the "for". Not a writing mistake, just a typing one
[/quote]
Huh?

[quote]
Again, more bullet statements, try to avoid those and you will do great. Keep up the good work!
[/quote]
Are they really that bad? I find them useful. I will mull on this.

[quote]
P.S. Sorry about the wall of text.
[/quote]
It's cool. Detailed analysis from other writers is what I need. This is perfect. Thank you.


edit: suddenly quotes don't work? Sorry. I would fix it but I don't know how.

Rashelle can run for a half hour in heavy armor without slowing or stopping. It's not a problem.

But seriously, Lokken is smaller than Solstheim. When I was writing this, I had notes with where everything was and what time it was so I had a good sense of the "real" distances involved. Rashelle's use of Recall also reduces round trip times. Her mileage in a given day in this story is not so bad.

I don't understand: "particularlly the fact that you say Rashelle focuses on listening." You lost me there. Sorry.

Here, I'll give you an example:



Basically, when you're playing Morrowind the game, the Nerevarine is the "strong, silent type". You're sentence there makes me think of in-game experience playing the game. It's like you're re-visiting it. I like that, so that's why I called it "Nerevarine-ish".

6. Wulfren

I put on a Chameleon effect ring. It was not a huge enchantment but combined with careful sneaking it would make me effectively invisible. It was time to scout the castle. Whatever happened in the next few days, I would benefit by having a mental map of the castle. Dark against the snow, yet unobserved, I crept around the castle, up the stairs, and in through the front door.

I had trained my ability sneak over the years, both in the Thieves Guild and in the School Of Hard Knocks. It may seem a contradiction to some that I was a member of both the Thieves Guild and of House Redoran. I can only shrug and say that I had been in the Guild some time before joining my House. They had been there for me when no one else was. The Guild taught me many vitals skills that I find forever useful and without which my lifespan would have been much shortened.

Like a shadow, a wraith, I traversed the castle. Seen by no one, I picked locks and re-locked them behind me. I memorized rooms, corridors, locations.

I found the Shaman's room but the spells on the lock, the door, the hinges, the doorjamb itself ... were not something I wanted to deal with yet.

The door to the South East tower I could not get a good look at as a guard stood right next to the door. I detected no magic from it though. This was the tower that Laurenna had previously directed my attention to, the one where her mother was imprisoned.

There was a room labeled as a "Trophy Room" but the room was almost devoid of trophies. Odd, that. A woman was sleeping in a chair. I slipped quietly back out.

A door labeled "Berserkers" had a lock of such complexity that I could not get though it. Perhaps it was just as well, as I thought I heard movement inside.

The locks for the room labeled "Master Bedroom" I could not pick or spell open either.

In a stretch of corridor with no one around, I removed the chameleon ring. I had done all the sneaking I could do, so now I would try speechcraft and talk to as many people as I could.

The prison area had no prisoners and only one guard. His name was Von Schlep and he was rather a personable and talkative person. I would not have expected to like a prison guard, but I did. We chatted for some time. While he would not come out and say it, I could tell that he did not like Ragnar and that he secretly wished Wulfren was around.

I talked to other people but didn't learn anything that Von Schlep had not already told me.

It was still night when I entered Laurenna's cottage, using the key she had give me before. I now had a good mental map of the castle, which I knew I would need in the future. I settled onto my sleeping fur and was fast asleep.

Laurenna was up as early as yesterday.

"Rashelle! What news?"

"I found the wolf. He is with Snorri. He had been hit by Ragnar's men and was poisoned. Granny Torunn made him a potion. Now we wait and see."

"Oh Rashelle, that is good news. Thank you."

She didn't look very happy. Something must have happened yesterday while I was away.

"What happened?"

"Last night mother sent me the 'danger' signal through her window in the tower. Something is wrong. Can you go in the castle and talk to Kielreen and find out what is going on?"

I nodded, and was off.

In the castle, no one remarked upon my helm: good. Ragnar and his shaman were already up and were in the throne room. Did they sleep there? They ignored me which was just as well by me. Kielreen didn't have any information about Sigrid, but she promised that she would investigate, and asked me to come back later.

This worried me.

It started to snow as I returned to Laurenna, who was again at her "post".

"Kielreen has heard nothing."

"I'm worried, Rashelle."

"So am I."

"Well, at least I can still see her in the tower. Oh I wish we had taken the time to work out a better set of signals."

"One doesn't plan to be imprisoned in a tower or thrown out of a castle."

Silence.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"It's OK."

"I think now I need to go check on Snorri and his patient."

"Be careful in these woods, Rashelle."

I grinned and then a thought occurred to me.

"Laurenna, does your brother have white hair like you and your father?"

"Yes, of course".

"And are his eyes blue?"

"Yes."

The pieces were perhaps beginning to come together in my mind. Since I did not want to give Laurenna a false hope, I left without saying anything more.

It was in an absentminded and unfocused way that I dispatched two frost boar and a riekling that attacked me as I walked to Snorri's hideout. Despite the urge to hurry, I did not take a direct route. I did this because a second thought had occurred to me: what if Ragnar was having me followed? I thought about levitating so as not to leave tracks but the snow was falling thickly enough that my tracks were being covered anyway, at least until I reached the eastern green part of Lokken.

Focus, Rashelle; be wary but not paranoid.

As before, I made a careful and noisy entrance to Snorri's place. Snorri was standing on the wooden platform as he had last night. He looked tired but happy: he must have stayed up all night watching over the wolf.

"Rashelle, the potion has worked. The wolf is doing much better now."

"Excellent."

"He wants to talk to you".

I raised an eyebrow. My suspicious as to the wolf were becoming certainties.

"Might be better if you just went back there to see him and let him explain."

I ascended the steps the the wooden platform, then followed the cave as it continued on back. It turned to the left and there was a chamber with a large mat of straw. A lantern on a crate provided light.

For the first time I saw the big white wolf. He was resting on the straw.

His eyes were indeed blue. Human eyes. How could anyone mistake them for wolf eyes?

"Wulfren The White, son of Wulfgar The White, so nice to finally meet you," I said.

Nothing happened. I had hoped that Naming him would restore him to his human form but the spell upon him was not one of those spells.

The wolf laughed. I sat down on the stone floor.

"How did you guess, lass?" spoke the wolf.

"It took me a while to figure it out. I eventually recalled some of my old Transfiguration studies. Aside from lycanthropy and related diseases, to transform an unwilling person permanently into an animal is rather a difficult spell to do ... but it is possible. Not everything transforms, however. Things like eyes tend to remain unchanged. That was my clue."

The wolf nodded. If he raised an eyebrow I was going to be hysterical.

"I presume Ragnar's shaman did this to you?"

"Aye."

"Laurenna never mentioned that you spoke. She certainly does not realize you are her brother. Were you able to speak before today?"

"No. Snorri was able to restore that much of my humanity to me."

I nodded.

"By the way, who are you?"

I laughed, took off my helm and then said "I'm sorry. I did not mean to be rude. I am Rashelle, spellsword, at your service."

He raised an eyebrow.

He waited the minute or two it took me to stop laughing. I wiped tears from my eyes, gasping for breath.

"I-I-I'm sorry" I sniffled, "It's just that I've never s-seen a wolf do that."

"You were saying," he prompted.

So I related to him what had occurred since I had arrived at Lokken.

I concluded with; "I cut off my hair and swore a vow to restore you as the rightful chieftain, as Laurenna has done."

"I appreciate what you have done for me, Rashelle, but why are you doing this?"

"I could not live with myself if I left the Lokken people in this situation."

I continued; "Also, in this very short time Laurenna has become a very good friend. I do this for her. I'm in this all the way and will see it to the end."

He nodded. Then he spoke.

"As I hope you understand, the rumor of me slaying my father is completely false. Instead, I happened to witness when his step-brother Ragnar thrust his sword into his heart. His evil shaman Kreikan, who was also there, cast a spell and transformed me into a wolf. Since then, I have been wandering in the forests, trying to keep an eye on the village and on my sister Laurenna."

I nodded.

"I'm so worried about my mother and my sister. My mother is held prisoner, and I fear that Ragnar might abduct Laurenna, as well. For a year, he has tried to force my mother into a marriage, as that is his prime chance to become the rightful chieftain. But she stubbornly refuses. Now, he has got a second chance: as I am no longer human, the only remaining blood-relative of my father is Laurenna. If Ragnar cannot marry my mother, he might instead force Laurenna into a marriage."

If I hadn't already been sitting I probably would have sat down hard. I hadn't thought of that. It was perfectly logical and obvious, if evil. I had a momentary thought of going and fetching Laurenna here. I actually began to stand up. But that would then result Sigrid giving in and marrying Ragnar. I swore and sat back down.

"Wulfren; how can I protect Laurenna?"

"I need to be restored to my human form. I need to avenge my fathers murder and take my rightful place as the Chieftain of Lokken. Only then will my mother and sister be safe"

I nodded.

"I fear time is running out. Something must be done soon, but I am still weak from the poison. On top of that, there is not much I can do as a wolf. The spell Kreikan cast on me is very strong. As long as he is alive, I will remain like this. Only if he dies will I regain human shape."

I nodded. Wulfren's idea for breaking the spell agreed with what lore I could remember on the subject of unwilling transformation.

"Enough. I will kill Kreikan now," I said as I stood up again.

"No!" barked Wulfren.

I stopped.

"I would surely like to see Kreikan dead," he continued, "but it would be a really dangerous mission. And I fear that even if you succeeded, the result would me more blood and violence. Ragnar Fire Hair would surely want his revenge. If I showed up in my human shape, he would probably kill both me, my sister and my mother."

I sat down again. "No, not Laurenna."

"He is incredibly strong. Even though I'm a skilled warrior, I don't think I have the skills to outmaneuver him. Now, if I only had ... "

"The warhammer of Thorjan Bjorg," I interrupted, "and the gauntlets of Thorjan."

"Aye, lass, you are well informed indeed! My Father used to tell me about the Warhammer of Thorjan Bjorg - an incredibly powerful weapon. It could kill the strongest opponent with a single blow. With such a weapon in my hand, I would have a fair chance to fight Ragnar. Alas, I have no idea where this mighty weapon is hidden. I think my father knew, but he took the secret with him to his grave."

"Then I will find it and bring it to you."

"Rashelle, just note that the warhammer is incredibly heavy. It is useless without Thorjan's gauntlets. You need to be wearing those in order to lift it and wield it.

I nodded. I would look for the gauntlets first.

"I guess the first step is to simply ask around in the village. Someone really ought to know. Maybe Laurenna could give you a hint: she has many friends in the village."

I nodded and stood up.

"Thank you Rashelle."

I bid Wulfren good day, spoke briefly to Snorri and walked towards the entrance of the cave. Once out of Snorri's view, I Recalled back to my spot by the cottage.

Hehehehe, my speculations about the wolf were basically right, well, close enough that I'm satisfied with my brilliance

Anyways, this update was quite strong accept for one part that kinda bugged me. Here it is:


Now I know that I mentioned the change of tenses earlier, but this paragraph is a worse case than the last one (which I've accepted more since then). If I could make a suggestion, I would make sure to make each tense a separate paragraph because reading two tenses in the same paragraph does not flow well. I'm pretty sure when I have used that effect, this is the method I use.

Hope that helps, continue with the story, bud!

Wow. You know how many times I've read through that part and never noticed that it was not first person? I'm off to bed now but I will fix that tomorrow. What a blockhead I am. Thanks.

edit: I changed it. It should be better now.

Up until now there have been two errors with point of view. Specifically, two sentences in two chapters were written in third person. The first one was done deliberately but since then I realized that it was lame so that has been changed to match the rest of the story. The second one was done completely by accident: I had no idea. That has been fixed as well.

Remember when I said that there was one more deliberate third-person sentence coming up? This is the chapter it's in. I hope it works.



--
7. Loss

"Laurenna. I have very good news, but brace yourself for a shock anyway".

"OK."

"The White Wolf is your brother. I spoke to him. He is recovering nicely."

"So that is why you asked me what color his eyes were before."

"Yes. I had a suspicion this morning but did not want to say anything to you until I was certain."

"I understand."

"Wulfren confirms that Ragnar killed your father. He was there when it happened and that is why the shaman transformed him into a wolf."

"Oh Rashelle, I just knew that Wulfren didn't kill our father. I knew that Wulfren was alive."

She paused. It continued to snow.

She then spoke again: "Oh my gods ... what if those poisoned arrows had killed him! Rashelle, You have saved my brothers life... I... I... oh words are not enough to tell you how grateful I am."

I waited. What could I say?

"I believe I have heard some rumors about those gauntlets in the village. You should ask around and someone may be able to give you a clue"

I nodded.

"Ages ago I think I've heard Lisendra mention Thorjans's gauntlets. She is a ... hrm ... witty girl who usually spends her time drinking mead or hunting boyfriends, I mean hunting with her boyfriends. She's usually in the main hall. It's the one who is laughing constantly"

I smiled at her use of "it's". Laurenna definitely did not approve of Lisendra any more than Lisendra did of her.

I was tempted to shed Lisendra in a better light by relating what had occurred the last time I saw her, but that would wait for a better time.

Laurenna continued: "Just take care of yourself, will you? And if you go off to find those gauntlets, please look after yourself! Please don't let anything happen to you!"

I flashed a smile and left.

Surprisingly, Lisendra was not in the main hall. I chatted briefly with the guys, obliquely inquiring about the warhammer and the gauntlets. No one had heard anything concrete about their whereabouts.

I was concerned over Lisendra's absence, especially in view of the state she had been in when I last left her. I left the main hall and walked in the falling snow to Lisendra's house.

I knocked on the door.

"Lisendra. It's Rashelle. Are you alive?"

She opened the door, "Hello there."

She waved me in and pointed to a chair. She sat on her bed.

"Thanks for taking care of me before. I'm sorry to put you through that. I didn't even know your name until you said it just now."

"It's OK. I was concerned when I didn't see you in the main hall just now. How are you feeling?"

"I'm much better now, Rashelle. I've sworn off the mead, and the hanging out at the main hall, at least for a few days. I need to collect my thoughts."

Good.

I very much wanted to ease her suffering by telling her the good news about Wulfren, but I didn't trust her to not accidently spill the beans to the wrong person. For Laurenna's sake, it would be best that no one in the town knew that Wulfren had been "found".

"Lisendra, I've heard rumors around town about a legendary set of gauntlets, called Thorjan's gauntlets. Do you know anything about them?"

"I'll tell you what I know, but it isn't much."

I nodded.

"There is a warhammer that is supposed to be very powerful, allowing a man to fight things he might not otherwise be able to fight. The drawback to this weapon is that it is exceptionally heavy. To work around this, the gauntlets of Thorjan were made. One must be wearing the gauntlets to use the warhammer. They have an enchantment that enables one to use the warhammer with ease."

I nodded. This is good. I had not spoken of the warhammer to Lisendra so her mention of it further verified what Wulfgar had told me.

"Have you ever met the hunters Gartheim and Ingemar? They are usually hunting in the area around Granny Torunn's cottage."

"No."

She described them.

Then she said; "Those two I have heard talking about the gauntlets, and also about a warhammer. You should talk to them."

"I will. Thank you Lisendra."

She nodded.

It took an hour to find them. Well, I actually only found one of them: Gartheim. I asked him about Thorjan's gauntlets.

"Ingemar I think would know about that", said Gartheim. "He rambles on about them all the time when we hunt. They are supposed to be in a secret cave, filled with evil creatures. He has often talked about how to overcome the creatures and get those gauntlets of incredible strength but I'm not sure he has the skills to do so himself."

I nodded.

"Alas, Ingemar isn't around. He went to explore a snow bear cave up near the northern coastline two days ago. I have not seen him since. I'm concerned about him. I suspect something has happened to him."

I looked questioningly at him.

"Well, you see, lass, those snow bears are nothing to mess with, especially one in its lair. We've hunted them but only outdoors and even then it is dangerous. Better to stick to smaller game. It would be very dangerous going in that cave. I warned him not to go."

"You know," I said, "I could go there and take a look for you."

"Would you? Great! I must admit that I'm really afraid to go to that cave. I believe that is the hideout for a female snow bear with cubs and such 'ladies' are extremely dangerous. Now, the cave is located at the north cape of Lokken island. The entrance is close to the mountain side. Good luck."

"North coast. Snow bear cave. I'm on it."

Through the swirling snowfall, I traveled. It was beautiful.

I found a cave in the approximate area. The odds were that it was the correct cave. Sword ready, moving silently, I entered.

Immediately the snow bear came at me. I darted to one side, slashing. Wicked claws smashed against my cuirass, doing no damage but knocking me to one side.

With a speed surprising for a creature its size, the bear came at me again. I rolled out of the way, stabbing. I darted away and the bear roared and turned to attack me again. This time I was ready and with a powerful thrust I finished the beast.

Why do these stupid animals always attack? I find no sport or thrill in hunting for its own sake but when attacked I defend myself. I would have been happy to nip into the cave, find Ingemar, and nip out again, leaving the snow bear alone.

I wiped Chrysamere clean and walked past the snow bear. I carefully continued to walk deeper into the cave. The cave went on for only a short while and ended.

I froze.

Here were two creatures that were not attacking me; two small snow bear cubs. Gartheim had mentioned cubs but that fact hadn't really registered with me until now. They looked up at me with such cute little innocent eyes.

And I had just killed their mother.

The Nerevarine, hero of Vvardenfell, Bloodskaal, Clan Friend of the Ashlanders, Chieftain Of Thirsk, Hortator of three Great Houses, a House Father of House Redoran and veteran of countless battles, collapsed to the floor and wept uncontrollably.

Not the end of a chapter I was hoping for...

8. Hammer

I don't know how long I stayed there, aghast at what I had done, before I was interrupted.

"Lass, are you OK? What's going on?", called out a Nord male voice.

I started. I had completely forgotten that I had come in here to rescue someone. Focus Rashelle; get a grip.

"I-I-Ingemar, is that you?", I called as I pulled myself to my feet.

"Yes, I'm up here".

I picked up my sword from where it fallen and sheathed it. I walked back towards the entrance, wiping my eyes.

Unnoticed before, I saw a thin fissure or channel in the rock that led up to a second smaller chamber, high enough that a bear could not reach it. Ingemar was there. The fissure could be used by a man or mer as a climbing aid but not by a bear.

"Ingemar, I was sent to rescue you by Gartheim. Nothing here will attack you now."

He descended and I then asked him about Thorjan's gauntlets.

"Oh yes, I know where to find them! I was actually planning to go there, myself, but the place is supposed to be filled with evil creatures, and after facing this snow bear beauty, I've had enough of creatures for quite a while. It's a pity, because the gloves are supposed to give their owner incredible strength."

He explained that they were in the Grundalund cavern. The entrance was halfway up the mountainside on the north-west side of the island. I would most likely need a levitation potion to get up there. The entrance should be facing the water.

He looked towards the back of the cave and saw the two cubs.

"If you leave those snow bear babies, they will starve to death. They are too young to fend for themselves".

"I know," I said quietly.

I went back to the snow bear cubs. I stroked their fur and they bumped against me like cats sometimes do.

"Come on little ones," I said in a small voice, "I'm going to take you with me. I-I'll find you a new home even if I have to take care of you myself."

The cubs followed me.

Ingemar was gone. I guess he had departed to rejoin his friend.

The cubs and I left the cave. It had stopped snowing and the sunshine was bright. From the position of the sun it was now mid to late afternoon.

I decided that either Fjorngrin or the Snorri would know what to do with the bears and I concluded that Fjorngrin was closer so I'd go there now. The bears were slow but they followed me faithfully.

Something interesting happened on the way. We were attacked by a frost boar and the cubs defended me by hurling frost bolts at it! I had not realized that snow bears had that ability so young.

We arrived at Fjorngrin's house without further incident.

"Fjorngrin, it's Rashelle. Please come out."

The door swung open and his eyes widened when he saw me crouched outside his house, one arm protectively over each snow bear cub

"Fjorngrin, Don't kill them. They are with me."

"What happened?"

"Their mother attacked me. I had to defend myself. I didn't know she had cubs. I couldn't leave them. I have to find them a new home."

"I can raise them," he said, "it's no trouble."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, they'll be good company."

"You won't kill them?"

"Lass, have no fear. At this young age they can be made accustomed to people ... well, to their owners anyway. If you introduce them to me now and I raise them, they'll be tame around us. I wouldn't take them into the village though."

I nodded. I understood.

I know bears can't understand human speech but it helped me to speak to them anyway. "This is Fjorngrin. He's a friend. He's going to take care of you. You'll be living with him now. This is your new home."

With surprising tenderness, Fjorngrin petted the bears. They bumped up against him just as they had for me.

I stood up.

"thank you Fjorngrin. I know it's a lot to ask but I know I could not raise them."

"Lass, I'm a man of nature more than of the village. The bears and I will enjoy each others company immensely. Have no worries: I raised a snow bear once before, back when I was a lad."

I had never seen him smile a smile that big before: I had made the right decision.

Feeling much better than I had in the past hour, I forced myself to return to business: time to find the gauntlets and then the warhammer.

I had spent enough time in Lokken to get a sense of what was where. The mountain behind Laurenna's house was actually the center of the island. I Recalled to Laurenna's house to give myself a shorter trip.

"Laurenna. I received some information and I'm off to fetch the gauntlets. Not sure when I'll be back so don't wait up."

"Be careful, Rashelle."

I walked down the trail. When I reached the castle I turned right. This lead downhill and away from the castle and into the forest. Once safely out of sight of the castle I cast levitation and turned to the right, and up.

Snow covered landscape is beautiful from the air as well. I floated North. The mountain was on my right.

I floated along a little longer and I spotted something on the North West face of the mountain: a little black box.

I descended. As I got closer it grew and I could see that it was actually a Nord barrow. I was looking for a cave, not a tomb, but the location was about right.

I landed at the foot of the door and canceled the levitation. Slowly I spelled out the Nordic runes on the door. G-r-u- ... yes it was the Grundalund cavern.

I looked through my potions, placing the healing ones where I could grab them easily. Really I would have to make more soon.

Sword out and ready, I entered. It looked like a Nord tomb inside as well.

A skeleton berserker rushed towards me. I met it with Chrysamere, shattering it into bones with two strokes.

I moved forward. The corridor turned to the right. I crept stealthily, slipping on my chameleon ring. The corridor turned left into a branching of the ways. As I stepped into this branching, two skeleton berserkers attacked from my left and a draugr from my right.

The combat was fast and furious and generated a lot of noise: so much for the stealthy approach. I parried the Nordic silver longsword swung by one of the skeletons, then swung Chrysamere around to the right to chop the draugr.

Dropping and rolling to my right, I managed to put the draugr between me and the skeletons. Undead are generally not that sharp and this was demonstrated again as both skeletons swung their swords and killed the draugr for me.

This was all fine but a skeleton champion and a bonewolf appeared from behind a corner and were also attacking me.

Nothing but to take it, and dispatch them one or two at a time. I shuddered as each sword or fang was stopped by my armor. The bonewolf was doing the least damage but was easiest to swing at so I killed it first (if one can speak of "killing" something already dead, that is).

I ducked another sword-slash and smashed one of the skeletons. Two down, three to go.

An elbow to the skull got one skeleton champion away from me for a few precious seconds, leaving me able to focus my attention on the other skeleton.

A swing left and the skeleton was shattered. A swing right and my sword bit into the skeleton champion. Another swing and it was over.

The passage in front of me simply looped around to return as the passage to the right. I turned left and pressed on.

The corridor almost immediately turned to the right, then to the left. This led out into a cavern. Four skeletons came at me.

I swung and shattered the closest one. I parried three swords, shoved them all to the side, and got a slash in.

Two left.

Another slash. One left.

A sword bounced off my cuirass. I chopped. None left.

There was nasty gash on my arm I hadn't noticed before: quaffing a potion handled that.

I moved forward into the cave. There was a pit to my left. Skeletons in it ran in frenzied circles. They couldn't get up here and none had bows so I ignored them and moved on, passing from the cave chamber into a sort of natural corridor.

Five skeletons, two of them the berserker variety, ran towards me as I entered the next chamber. By dodging side to side, while either kicking or using my sword I fought and destroyed them.

This chamber was larger. Like the previous one it had a pit, but this was a larger pit and it had a ramp formed from a large stone. Up this swarmed more skeletons.

Parrying and swinging, I fought through the mass of skeletons and descended the ramp.

Splish splash: I hadn't seen it from above but this lower chamber had a foot or so of rather cold water. At least it was shallow.

Up ahead of me the floor rose up from the water. Relieved, since I don't like water, I followed. This led into another passage. There was only one skeleton in it: that was a nice change. Two swings: that was easy.

I only had a few minor wounds so I paused to use a simple healing spell instead of wasting a potion.

A hail of arrows met me as I entered the next chamber. I ran back the way I came, sucking a health potion since one arrow had gone into my arm.

Only one skeleton followed me, and it had a sword, not a bow. That was easy.

I waited. The archers were not following me. Odd.

I ran into the chamber again, this time casting a large fireball. Now I could see by the light of the flames why the skeleton archers had not followed me: they were on the opposite side of a larger deep pit. They had no way to get across.

A second, larger, fireball finished them.

Now I was alone and had time to look around a bit. I cast a light spell. In front of me was the pit. I could not see how far down it went, although I thought I could hear water. To my left was a stone door. Across the pit, in the opposite wall of the cave, was a sort of natural platform of stone. That was where the skeleton archers had been. There appeared to be a box or something over there. Just then my light spell expired.

I cast levitate and floated over.

As I set down on the platform I could see that the box was a chest. A moment to pick the lock (I could have spelled it but I like to practice my non-magical skills) and I had the chest open.

Inside the chest were two gauntlets. A prickling sensation of enchantment ran through me when I touched them. The enchantment on one was a powerful Feather spell, allowing large burdens to seem lighter. The other had a powerful fortify strength spell, allowing one to lift still more and to also have much more force in any blow dealt with a weapon.

Both enchantments were continuous: constant effect.

These had to be Thorjan's gauntlets. Nice.

I almost Recalled back to Laurenna's there and then. I would then ask around the town to find the warhammer. However, a thought occurred to me: I had not explored the entire cavern system. What if the warhammer was also here? From what I had been told it would be useless without the gauntlets. Logically, one would expect the gauntlets to not be far from the warhammer.

I levitated back over the pit. The levitation spell cut out and I opened the door. It was a large block of stone and it swung ponderously aside.

Stepping forward, I found myself in a large chamber, taller than it was wide. Scattered around were skeletons ... but the dead non-moving sort. That was a change.

Various weapons and pieces of armor were also scattered about.

There were some Nordic tomb lights, the sort that look like truncated stone pillars with flames on them.

On the far side of the chamber, past two thick stone pillars. stood a man in odd-looking armor. The armor was a cross between Nordic mail and some sort of custom armor. A skull motif featured in it. The helm had a huge set of horns on it, looking both ridiculous and oddly sinister at the same time. It was an open helm in that it revealed a chin with a white beard, but it covered the rest of the face, with only eye-slits like a closed helm. I dubbed him "Bull man" because of the horns. Presumably he had something to do with the skeletons on the floor. Later on when I related the tale to Laurenna, she explained that he was probably the legendary berserker known as "The Mad Bull".

Behind him were two torches and two more stone pillars. Between the pillars was a door.

Bull Man zapped me with a frost spell. I guess we were not going to talk. My magicka level rose as the spell was diffused and its energy absorbed. He tried it again. This time the powers of my birth-sign did not absorb the spell, but I've always had this strange affinity to cold, like a Nord. The coolness felt refreshing. I laughed.

Bull Man made a sound somewhere between a scream and grunt and then rushed towards me.

I stood and held my sword ready, intending to meet his charge.

He approached at an alarming rate. He was big: even bigger than Ragnar Fire Hair. Oh oh: change of plans.

I dropped, rolled, swung. Chrysamere connected but didn't do much damage. The roll and the swing gave me momentum to dodge his charge and his axe-swing.

Like a bull, he didn't turn until after he had run a few yards past me. He made a sound like a grunt of rage.

I hit him with a fireball and then cast a levitation spell on myself. The melee combat thing was not going to work here.

I cast a spell to reduce his resistance to fire-based spells before casting another fireball.

I suppose this would have been a good time to take a bow out and pepper him with arrows, from safely up in the air. The thing is, I never could get the hang of the whole archery thing.

I hit him with a simple but powerful health damage spell. It should have killed him.

It didn't. Bellowing for all the world exactly like a maddened and injured bull, Bull Man ran around in circles.

I flew away from him and swooped down to fetch an axe from the floor. I rose again, hefting the axe to get a feel for the weight and the balance. It was a nice large double-edged battle axe.

Come on Bull Man, stay still for a second!

He didn't stand still but at a time when he was running in a straight line I threw the axe. It spun towards him. I throw better than I shoot. The edge of the blade chopped him right in the face. It should have killed him.

My thrown axe fell and clattered to the floor.

With a gurgling sort of bellowing, he shook a fist upwards at me and took another swing in the air with his axe.

I rose higher, positioned myself, stopped the levitation, and fell like a stone. I smashed down on his back with my feet. He was down, still struggling, when I swung Chrysamere.

Finally he was dead.

I searched the body and took some coins and a key.

I walked to the back of the cave, between the two torches, to the door. The door was locked but Bull Man's key unlocked it.

Readying my sword, I opened the door and walked though.

I walked along a passage that opened up into another chamber. It was a pleasant surprise to enter a chamber devoid of hostiles.

I sheathed my sword.

There was a pile of gem-stones and gold coins. I took the emeralds, as they are useful for making health restoration potions, and left the rest.

Behind this was a stalhrim coffin with a skeleton in it. The rubies in the eye sockets were a creepy touch. Presumably this was the tomb of Thorjan, whose warhammer I was questing for.

Behind that, on a high stone pillar was a warhammer. I levitated up to it and tried to lift it. I could not. Good: it was the right one.

Mission doubly accomplished: not only did I have the gauntlets but I now also had the warhammer of Thorjan. I slipped the gauntlets on and then lifted the weapon.

I floated down, canceled the levitation and took a few test swings with the warhammer. Oh yes, very nice! Man, I could do some damage with this thing.

The warhammer was most likely too heavy for my pack to hold without breaking so I simply carried it.

It was sunset when I exited the caverns. From this height it was quite a sight. I sat down to watch it. I munched some food from my pack and ate some snow. It was dark when I was finished.

Rather than risk drawing attention to the area around Laurenna's house, I levitated North and then East around the mountain. Once I saw the ground turn from white to dark (which would be green had it been daylight) I flew lower, below treetop level. The levitation spell wore off and I fell to the ground. My acrobatics are decent so I landed without breaking anything. Two frost boar objected to my landing spot but that was a trivial matter. I sent one flying in the air with the warhammer.

That was a very efficient process of dealing with that barrow, and it's also nice to see those bear cubs find a home. I also have to add that the Bull Man seemed to be quite the dangerous opponent, I was shocked at how much damage the Nerevarine of all people had to deal to take down that sucker. But at least Rashelle has the gauntlets and the warhammer. Looks like she is near to completing her goal, I look forward to seeing how that goes.

The pace you're setting is amazing. I can't keep up!

I felt sad about the cubs though it looks like some sort of a happy end has been achieved. And that barrow sounds like one tough tomb. Ok, Skeletons aren't that hard but with the numbers you used, it's a different story. Not that it could change the outcome in the end. If Chrysamere is involved, you know that the good guys will be victorious.

So please, don't slow down.

9. Preparing, Waiting

Once again making much noise and announcing myself, I entered Snorri's hideout.

"Evening Snorri," I said as I approached the wooden platform. "Is Wulfren decent?"

He chuckled and waved a hand back towards the wolf.

I saw a healthier looking wolf. More rested perhaps. Since I was wearing the gauntlets and holding the warhammer in my hand, Wulfren did not need to ask me how things had gone.

"Rashelle," he exclaimed immediately, "You have them. That is amazing!"

With a heavy dull thunk I placed the warhammer on the floor by the wolf. I removed the gauntlets and placed them on the warhammer.

"Wulfren: when I pledge my sword and spells, I don't kid around."

He nodded.

I pointed to the warhammer and continued: "The stories are true: that thing is heavy. You can't even lift it without putting on the gauntlets first."

I flexed a bicep and said, " ... and I'm not exactly a slouch in the muscle department, either."

"Now let us talk strategy" said Wulfren.

I nodded and then sat down on the floor; easier to see eye-to-eye with Wulfren that way.

"First, let me say how sorry I am that I have made you take such risks. If it hadn't been for the sake of my sister and mother, I would never have asked you. Rashelle, you are beyond doubt the bravest fighter I have ever met. If the circumstances were different, I would have tried to get that warhammer myself. But I am only a poor creature, unable to defend and protect anyone. As I said before, only the death of Kreikan will remove the spell and make me a man again."

"Then I will kill him."

"Rashelle, I couldn't possibly ask you to take such a risk. It's a dangerous task and I would never forgive myself if something happened to you."

"I'm volunteering. He's powerful but I know I can take him."

"Yes, I understand that you are a skilled fighter, but nonetheless, I'm not used to letting others fight for me."

"Wulfren, I am going to kill him. End of story. Please do go on."

"Very well, then. There is a secret passage in the castle between the master bedroom and the throne room. If you use that you might be able to sneak up behind Kreikan and catch him by surprise. This should give you a better chance of killing him."

I nodded. Sneaking is good, regardless of what my fellow Redoran compatriots would say. Less hurt for me: more for my enemies. It's a win-win situation.

"Both the exterior rooftop door and the interior door to the master bedroom are locked."

I nodded. I remembered trying and failing to pick those locks.

"I'm sure one of the maids has the key. Laurenna knows the maids so she will be able to work that out. I have heard that the secret passage should lead to other places as well but I don't know for sure."

"Maybe there is even a bolt hole or escape passage, " I commented, "It seems every castle has one of those."

Wulfren then continued, "Ragnar is extremely strong and so are his guards. Even you can not kill Kreikan when they are around. Sometimes Ragnar goes hunting. He usually brings some of his men with him. When that happens you should have a better chance to kill Kreikan. Be sure that you have both a good weapon and all kinds of potions with you - he is an infamous spell-caster and he can both paralyze and poison you."

I grinned and made sparks fly from my fingers.

"Rashelle! Promise me you won't take an unnecessary risks! Aaargh, I really truly hate being a wolf! I would have wanted to face the danger, myself, instead of sending you straight into it. Be careful, please!"

"I will."

"And after you have killed Kreikan, don't leave Laurenna alone! As soon as Ragnar finds out what has happened, he will get furious. I have no idea what he will do. Please stay with Laurenna in her cottage until I show up! As soon as the curse is broken I will hurry and meet you there."

I nodded.

"At that point we'll plan our next steps. For now, you should go to Laurenna, plan out details as to obtaining the secret passage key, and then wait for Ragnar to go hunting."

I stood up.

"By your your leave, I will teleport out".

He nodded. I Recalled to to my spot by Laurenna's house. It was snowing again. Laurenna was there with her lantern.

I approached Laurenna.

"Rashelle, please tell me! Have you talked to my brother yet? Have you news on Sigrid?"

"No news on her. I've asked Kielreen at the castle to look into the matter. Wulfren has the gauntlets and hammer now. When next Ragnar goes hunting, I'm going to kill Kreikan. That will release the spell on your brother so that he then revert to human form and meet us here at the cottage. Wulfren said we can get a key to the secret passage from one of the maids and use that to sneak up on Kreikan."

She looked at me with ... disapproval? ... sadness?

"Rashelle, I really don't know what to say about that."

I waited.

"Oh yes, I do want Kreikan dead. He is evil and that is the only way for my brother to regain his human shape."

I remained silent.

"Rashelle, I'm afraid that something will happen to you. I ... really don't think I can bear that. You've been a good friend to me and that is a rare thing."

I smiled.

"This time. I'm not going to let you leave me behind. I will follow you to the castle and help you to kill Kreikan ... "

I shook my head but before I could object further she hissed: "Listen to me! You really need my help now!"

I waited.

"Wulfren mentioned that one of the maids might have a key to the master bedroom. This is true. The girl who has the key is Agnete. She is a friend of mine - we have been friends ever since my mother taught us how to read and write. You could never pursued her to give you the key, but I can. Therefore I must come with you."

I nodded. I was not happy but it was necessary.

"But it is not time to do anything yet. Just as Wulfren said, we will definitely have to wait until Ragnar goes on his next hunt. Here, I'm done for tonight, let us go inside."

We did.

Inside, Laurenna continued: "Let me write you a note to take to Kielreen. In the note I'll ask her to send a message to her aunt Gwenn when Ragnar leaves. That way, we can check with Gwenn to make sure the coast is clear before we go to the castle. I hope it is soon: I'm worried about my mother".

I sat while she wrote.

After a short time she said "There!"

I stood up and she handed me the note.

"She'll know it is me by the handwriting. I explained to her what I want her to do. I also wrote that she should probably find a reason to not be in the throne room once Ragnar leaves: I don't want her getting involved or hurt in the fight. Now in the meantime I'll have to practice my chameleon spell before it is time to go to the castle."

I nodded, carefully rolled the note up and placed it in my pack and departed out into the evening snow.

I didn't want to enter the castle so I procrastinated by dropping in to see Gwenn at the brewery. She and Borka were eating but she said she was glad to see me anyway. She told me that Granny Torunn wanted to see me.

Apologizing for interrupting their meal and thanking her for the message I walked to the castle.

I entered the throne room. Ragnar again ignored me. It was just as well. I bought a mug of Sujamma from Kielreen and slipped her Laurenna's note. She palmed it like she was in the Guild. We chatted briefly about carefully innocuous topics and then I left.

I thought about going back to Laurenna's and sleeping, but instead I set off East into the forest, to see Granny Torunn.

I reached her house and knocked on the door, announcing myself. She opened the door. Good; she had not yet gone to sleep.

"Gwenn said you wanted to see me."

"Yes, Rashelle. Do come in."

She gestured to a chair and asked if I wanted some mead. I accepted the former and declined the latter.

"Just before Wulfgar The White was killed," said Granny Torunn, "Sigrid asked me to prepare two amulets each for Laurenna and Wulfren - one for levitating and one for chameleon. I had them ready just the day before the murder, and then, because of all that happened, I forgot all about them. Earlier today, I was cleaning out some drawers, and then I found them. Please take them and give them to Laurenna."

I nodded and she handed them to me.

I could feel the enchantments on them; constant effect, all. Granny Torunn knew her stuff!

"Thank you ... and Laurenna thanks you."

"You're welcome."

I left. Outside her house I cast Recall.

I entered the cottage. Laurenna was in her bed but still awake.

"Rashelle, what news?"

"I gave the note to Kielreen."

Then I explained about Granny Torunn. I gave the two chameleon amulets and the two levitation amulets to Laurenna.

"Oh Rashelle, that's wonderful!"

She put one of them on and disappeared. Yes granny Torunn knew her stuff indeed. I went to my sleeping fur.

The next few days were both restful and tense. There was nothing left to do but wait. While Laurenna was at her "post", I would clean around the house. I would obtain food and supplies, both by hunting and and by buying things in the village. I cooked meals. As a cook I'm a great spellsword but Laurenna appreciated it anyway: she hadn't had time to do all of this.

When not doing the above I stayed outside with Laurenna, far enough away to be out of sight of the castle, just being there for her.

I checked with Gwenn two or three times a day. I avoided the castle. I tried not to fidget.

Events are set in motion, the plan is drawn up. I can't wait to see how this all pans out. That chameleon amulet is definitely going to be beneficial as well. Good work.

Good read, sorry for the lack of any constructive critisism, but I have to go soon and my day has not been that great so far. Just keep up your writing and hopefully I will play this mod soon and will know more about what is going on.

10. Action

One sunny morning I stopped at the Brewery and this time Gwenn had news for me.

"Rashelle! I have got a message from Kielreen. She says that Ragnar Fire Hair and some of his men have just left the castle."

This was excellent news. I thanked Gwenn and left.

I headed west, out of the village and in the direction of the west coast. As soon as I saw that I was out of sight of anyone in the village, I Recalled to the cottage.

I approached Laurenna at her "post" and said "Show time!"

She nodded, slipped on an amulet and disappeared.

"Rashelle, if I walk behind you I will leave extra footprints and will make the sound of extra footsteps, so I will float behind you with the levitation amulet. Agnete will most likely be in the trophy room. I think I can persuade her to give us the key to the master bedroom."

"Good idea. Ready?"

"Rashelle, you do realize that in an hour or less we may both be dead."

"Not if I can help it."

"Even so ... If something should happen to me ... promise that you will stay here for a while and help Wulfren. He has gone through many hard experiences, and I think he needs your support. When he was younger, he fell in love with Lisendra. They were steady for two years, but then she just walked out on him. She has always been a flirt, and I don't think she ever really cared for him. Now, she spends most of her time hunting with the boys - and hunting boys. He hasn't cared for a woman since then."

"I promise."

"Then let's go. Head on!"

Through the falling snow I walked down the path and to the castle. I ascended the stairs, nodded to the guard as if I owned the place, opened the door, and entered the castle. I held the door for an extra breath after I entered so Laurenna could quickly slip through.

I remembered the location of the trophy room from my previous explorations and walked unerringly there. We entered. I closed the door and saw that there was only one person in the room, a woman. She was the one I had seen sleeping in a chair the last time I was here. hopefully she was Laurenna's friend, Agnete.

She turned to me; "yes?"

"Agnete, it's me," I heard Laurenna's voice from my left, "I'm invisible."

"L-Laurenna?"

"Yes, it's me. We need your key to the master bedroom."

I admired Laurenna's subtle approach, so much like my own.

Agnete didn't look too happy.

Silence.

"Agnete. Please, it is important", said Laurenna's voice.

She signed and then produced the key. She held it out and it disappeared. Agnete gave a small yelp of surprise.

"Steady on: I'm invisible, remember?"

"Yes, I'm sorry," Agnete said.

Then Agnete continued; "You're taking the secret passage from the bedroom, aren't you?"

How many people knew about this supposedly secret passage?

Agnete continued, "You're going to use it to sneak into the throne room. No, don't tell me. But you should know this. I remember hearing once that it goes to other places as well, including the South East tower and possibly a bolt-hole out of the castle."

Innnnnnnteresting.

"Thank you, Agnete. I wouldn't have bothered you but this is the only way," said Laurenna's voice.

"One more thing, there may be undead somewhere in there. Be careful."

"Good to know. Thanks again. Rashelle: lead on."

I felt a key pressed into my hand. I took the key. We left.

A few moments walking through the myriad corridors of the castle had us at the interior door to the master bedroom.

I let us in. Once I was sure Laurenna was also inside (she poked me), I closed and locked the door.

We were in a wood-paneled hallway. Stairs led up. After I drew my sword we went up. This turned and led us into the actual master bedroom itself. Fortunately it was unoccupied. Oddly enough, there was an air of disuse: Ragnar was apparently not sleeping here.

"Laurenna?"

"Right here".

"Do you know where the door to the passage is?"

"No."

OK, time to use my thief skills. I carefully and quietly tapped along the wall for hollow sounds, also nudging candles and each of the many weapons hanging on the walls looking for triggers/switches.

Laurenna found the door: it was next to what looked like an altar. We entered.

Secret passages? What can one say about them? They are usually dark, claustrophobic, sometimes they have rats in them. Sometimes they have worse.

I have a fairly good sense of direction and I had my mental map of the castle so we reached the throne room in a very short time. We encountered nothing on the way.

This trap door had a peephole. Looking through the peephole I could see in the room. It was the throne room. I saw two guards in the center of the room and Kreikan two yards in front of me. The throne was to my left.

This was it. Deep breath. Focus.

I opened the door and darted out fast as I could.

The guards had just spotted me.

I ran, raising my sword. Kreikan turned and looked. I swung, hoping to chop his head off. Of course it didn't work that way.

He ducked my swing and hit me with some spells. There was fire involved and something that felt a little like a paralyze but I absorbed the spells, feeling my magicka level increase.

I swung again but this time he had an axe out and parried. Damn.

He hit me with another spell: fire bloomed around me. I ignored the pain and my sword chopped into him.

He hit me with another spell. I kicked him but not where I wanted to because he dodged. Something clanged off my armor: one of the guards was attacking on my right.

Kreikan cast another fireball, which took care of the guard for me but had no effect on me this time, mercifully.

This time I stabbed instead of slashed and my sword found his foul heart.

This would have been a perfect opportunity for the second guard to attack me. Fortunately he didn't. I pulled out my sword from the body and then saw that Laurenna had already killed the second guard. Considering that he was in full Nordic mail I was impressed.

I quickly dug out a healing potion and held it out to the air.

"Laurenna, healing potion?"

"I'm good," said Laurenna's voice.

Three dead. Laurenna and I still alive. Good.

I quaffed the potion. The pain of my burns immediately stopped.

"Rashelle, I've never seen you fight before. That was impressive."

"Ha! Practice makes perfect. You're no slouch yourself," I said as I pointed to the second guard.

I quickly searched through Kreikan's body. I took the keys and the gold.

"Rashelle, if the passage branches like Agnete said, we could maybe reach my mother and rescue her right now."

"OK. Let's do it."

No deep analysis and deliberation here. We re-entered the passage.

Again I trusted my sense of direction plus the mental map I had built up to reach the South East Tower. How many branches did this passage have?

I looked through the peephole. I saw a winding stairwell and a lit sconce in the wall and a tapestry.

"Laurenna," I whispered, "look in the peephole: can you tell if is this the right place?"

I moved to the side and waited.

"yes," Laurenna's voice whispered.

"Good. Expect at least one Ragnar guard. Let's go."

I opened the door and crept out.

The trap door appeared to close itself: Laurenna was out also.

I ascended the spiraling stairs.

There was a guard at the top of the spiral. I cast a paralyze spell before he could say anything. Something pushed past me and blood gushed from the guard's chest. It is possible to pierce mail but it is difficult: the angle of the thrust must be just right. Laurenna had managed it. He collapsed to his knees, made a choking sound, and died.

"Nice, Laurenna".

I moved forward to search the body but bumped into Laurenna.

"Oops"

"Sorry Rashelle ... OK, I've got his key."

Laurenna appeared.

"I can see you."

"I took the amulet off: mother needs to know that it is me."

I nodded.

She turned and unlocked the door. She opened it. She went in. I followed.

"Laurenna!"

"Mother!"

Laurenna sheathed her sword and ran to her mother, who hugged her. So this was Sigrid. I saw she had the family hair.

I coughed.

"This is my friend Rashelle."

"Yes, I saw her standing with you the other night," said Sigrid

"It's a pleasure to meet you but we really need to go right now," I said.

"yes of course."

I led them down the stairs.

"You know, if we had taken the other chameleon amulet with us we could have given it to Sigrid and left through the front door."

"I didn't think of that"

"Neither did I."

"Let's chance the undead and try the secret passage."

"OK."

"I think I'll keep the amulet off for now" said Laurenna, "so we don't bump into each other"

"OK."

We spiraled down and entered the secret passage without incident.

When it felt right, according to my mental map, I took one of the branches. Hewn rock alternated with stone-work as we progressed. Some sort of fungus hung in sheets from the ceiling, obscuring anything more than a few paces away. I led the way, using a Light spell for Laurenna's and Sigrid's sake.

"Steps down, be careful." I warned then as we descended deeper.

I heard them before I saw them: two skeletons. I hacked one in half. Laurenna darted past me and got the second one.

We continued.

An ancestor ghost. No problem.

We continued.

Two draugr. Laurenna dealt with one and I slew the other.

We reached water.

"Feh."

"What's wrong, Rashelle?"

"I hate water."

"Can you swim?"

"Yes, I eventually learned, but I hate it. Well, let's go. Going to get wet now."

I walked down the stone slope into the water, Laurenna and Sigrid behind me. It was only waist deep and seemed clean but it was very cold. I like cold but even I have my limits. I walked though a waterfall and then the rock floor sloped up. That took us out of the water.

We walked little bit longer. There seemed to be no more undead.

We reached a door.

"This must be the bolt hole outdoors. Laurenna?"

Laurenna disappeared.

I opened the door.

We emerged from a snow covered door behind the castle. I had walked a mere few yards away from this spot many times in the past few days without ever having noticed it: nice design. The path up to the cottage was to my right. I walked up it, an invisible Laurenna and a visible Sigrid behind me.

It was a happy three who entered the cottage.

With the luxury of time and location it was possible to make proper introductions. Laurenna asked Sigrid about the "danger" signal.

"That day, Ragnar told me that the white wolf was really my son. I agreed to marry him and in exchange he would have Wulfren restored to his human form."

"You know he would not have kept his end of the bargain. Wulfren alive and in human form would then still be the rightful chieftain."

"I-I know this now, but, Laurenna, it has been a long year and nothing was happening. I saw no way out."

"I understand. We got you out. It's going to be OK." I said.

"OK Rashelle," said Laurenna. "Now my brother will be in human form and will be on his way here. Now we wait."

"How did he get in human form?" asked Sigrid.

"We killed the shaman just before we rescued you."

"That's excellent news!" exclaimed Sigrid. "Oh thank you both!"

"It's not over yet, but for now, we wait."

"Rashelle," said Laurenna, "there is nothing to do while we wait for my brother to arrive. Why don't you take a nap and get some rest? You look tired. I'm too excited right now to sleep: why don't you use my bed?"

I did feel tired even though it was only the late morning: and she was correct in that there was nothing to be done for now.

I took off my helm and got into her bed.

"Sleep, Rashelle. I'll be watching over you".

I smiled up at her. Musing that I could not recall if anyone had ever said that to me, and that I liked hearing it, I fell rapidly into slumber. Potions are all good but nothing beats a good sleep.

I wish I had stayed awake.

Aye, cliffhanger!

I wished I had an invisible companion in Morrowind. Those are sure a heck of a lot more helpful than 'Pilgrim X' who just gets in the way of my swordswinging and then takes it personal. I hate having to rush in like a fricking berserker just to save them all the time.

Nice work, though Wulfren had better get down there quick.

Oh boy, oh boy! What's going to happen next? It doesn't look like it'll be a good thing. I can't wait to see what'll be though.

This is what you get from being absent a day or two! Several great updates....hmm now that isn�t bad right? On the contrary it�s good..it�s good to get some nice reading, and this certainly is. I find Rashelle a sweetie and I really wait for the continuation, to read about what will happen to her. It�s nice to get to know more about the Lokken-thingy, I am particularly interested in sceneries that obviously are inspired by the country I am from! Hmm it must be knowing about the creator of this mod....Emma!

So blockie my dear, continue this one, please!

11. Reaction, Justice

I snapped awake. Sigrid was calling my name and walking towards the bed. I didn't see Laurenna. I knew something was wrong.

"Where's Laurenna?" I asked as I got out of bed.

"I don't know. She went outside: she had to 'go'. but that was awhile ago, she hasn't ... "

I was outside. It was snowing now and I could see no tracks. Laurenna was nowhere in sight. Where was Wulfren for that matter? He must have had enough time to get back here by now.

I cast a spell used to detect enchantments. Laurenna had one levitation and one chameleon amulet with her so my spell should have located her. I detected nothing aside from the amulets in the cottage. She was either far away ... or inside the castle: the thick stone walls would block my spell. I knew then that they had come and kidnapped her when she was outside by herself.

Wulfren had warned me to stay with her. Now she was gone.

"If they harm so much as one hair on her head, they will die!"

I rushed back into the cottage.

"Sigrid. They have her. Somehow Ragnar knew and came back early from his hunting trip. I can't wait for Wulfren."

I gave her my one backup almsivi intervention scroll.

"If I'm not back in an hour then all is lost. Use this to escape to Gnisis."

I left.

I cast Jump and I shot towards the castle. I cast Slow Fall just as I was about to hit. I landed next to the exterior door to the master bedroom.

The guards looked at me but they seemed unsure as to what to do. I quickly let myself in with the key and had the door re-locked behind me before they could come to a decision.

Quick as a flash I was across the room and entering the secret passage.

I cast a Light spell and ran along the passage.

Ragnar's men were waiting for me.

I should have expected this but did not. It was entirely logical: the attack on his shaman had bypassed the guard in the anteroom and the ones outside. Therefore the secret passage had been used. In retrospect, it was logical and obvious to now patrol the passage.

I was caught unawares. I expected undead, not a cross-bow.

A bolt pierced my cuirass: from the pain I knew it hit something vital. That should have been impossible, bolts can't pierce ebony armor ... unless they were using daedric bolts. Another bolt hit me in the leg. I was down. Through a fog of pain I cast a large fireball down the passage. I cast another one. I followed it with a nasty toxic cloud spell.

Silence: maybe I had gotten them all.

I was going to faint. If I fainted now I would die. I took a potion, then another. The healing action of the potions pushed both bolts out. It hurt. I took a third potion.

Finally I was able to rise. That was a close one. Stupid, Rashelle: Always expect the unexpected.

I canceled the Light spell and moved at a slower, more cautious, pace.

My feet bumped a body. By the scorched smell I knew it was dead: a char-broiled mass of meat for the rats.

There was another body in the same condition. So there had been two stationed here. Casting a Night Eye spell to see in the darkness, I searched the bodies. I took a cross-bow and some bolts. I'm not good with bows but maybe I would get lucky. I moved forward again.

There was torch light at a branching: another of Ragnar's guards. I hit him with a fireball. Stupid, if anyone had a Reflect spell ... but they didn't.

As I approached the throne room, I could hear the clash of metal on metal: fighting.

I reached the door, looked though the peephole.

A Nord in Nordic mail armor was there, and he was fighting Ragnar. He was wielding the warhammer of Thorjan Bjorg. The warhammer identified him as Wulfren. I had only ever seen him in wolf-form: I did not know what he looked like as a man, aside from having white hair and blue eyes. That idiot must have decided to go directly to kill Ragnar by himself, leaving Laurenna and I entirely out of it. A noble and protective move, but stupid: Ragnar was winning. Ragnar was playing with him, as a cat does a mouse. Wulfren was favoring his side and was bleeding. He looked like he was going to drop the warhammer any second.

Then Wulfren was down. Ragnar kicked him once. Again. I winced as I heard ribs break. Turning from the peephole, I sheathed my sword. I then loaded and cocked the cross-bow.

"Ha! Crawl like a kwama. You'll beg for death, before I kill you." said Ragnar, "Then I'll rape your sister while your mother watches!"

I took another look. I could see only one guard and he was dead. Wulfren must have managed to kill him while also fighting Ragnar. Wulfren and Ragnar were alone in the throne room.

I would only get one chance to do this and marksman was not my strong suit. Focus Rashelle. Aim.

I opened the the trap door, aimed as quickly as I dared, and fired.

I was aiming for Ragnar's head but I hit him in the side. It may have been a fatal wound or it may not have been. If it were, it would take too long to kill him.

Dropping the cross-bow, I sprung out of the passage. Ragnar had turned and was now looking at me in astonishment.

I hit him with a targeted paralyze spell and ran towards him.

I reached him. He was motionless: the spell worked.

Looking the him straight in the eye I hissed, "Burn, fetcher."

With a hate as pure as sunshine, I put a hand on his chest and began to pour a fire spell into him.

I could tell when the paralyze cut out because he fell to his knees and began to scream. My hand stayed in contact and the fire got hotter. The scream was quickly silenced by white-hot flame.

He was dead but I wanted to continue burning him. I wanted to burn him until there was nothing left but ashes. It would have been very satisfying. I did not, because I was in a hurry: I needed to save Laurenna.

"Rashelle," said Wulfren weakly.

I turned to him, crouched down, and handed him a potion. "Drink this."

He drank it.

"Rashelle, I ... "

"Not now. Drink this."

I gave him another potion. There were cracking sounds as the potion set and healed broken ribs.

"I'm sorry I ... "

"Later. Focus, Wulfren. We need to save Laurenna. Are you healed now?"

"Yes. Let us go. Lead on."

I extended my hand. He grasped it and pulled himself up until he was standing.

"Wulfren," I said, "is there anyone left in the castle who will try to kill us?"

"No. The regular guards were loyal to my father. They followed Ragnar because he was the chieftain, not because of any great loyalty. They won't give us any trouble now."

"Good," I said. "Now Laurenna."

I ran towards the prison area, Wulfren at my heels. Where else would they take her? No one tried to stop us.

I entered the prison area and faced Von Schlepp.

"Von Schlepp. Ragnar and his men are all dead. Wulfren rules now. Where is Laurenna?"

"Oh thank goodness you are here Rashelle. You've got to help her. Ragnar's guards dragged that poor girl down here and threw her in that cell beneath the trap door. They took my key. They must have beaten her up severely, because she was in terrible shape. And all the time she was calling for you, Rashelle, begging for her to rescue you."

Enough. I darted past Von Schlepp to the trap door and I was down in Laurenna's cell.

She was a mess, Ragnar's goons had worked her over. She was bleeding. It tore me apart to see her like this. I'll kill them. No wait, I'd already done that. Focus, Rashelle.

"Rashelle, I knew you would come." she croaked in a small voice.

Searching my pack I discovered that I had used up all of my healing potions. I quaffed a restore magicka potion instead.

I laid my hands on her and poured healing magic into her. A blue glow suffused her.

I cradled her head and healed her bruised bleeding face.

I concentrated, focused, healed.

When I was done I said; "Ragnar and his henchmen are all dead. Wulfren is the chieftain now. You are safe now. It's over. We've won."

"Thank you, Rashelle. Thank you so much for everything."

"Is she all right?" Von Schlepp called down.

"Yes, thankfully," I called up to him.

"I don't think I've ever seen anyone smash a trap door from its hinges with one kick before," he said.

I turned back to Laurenna and asked her, "Can you stand up?"

"Y-yes. Thank you Rashelle".

I helped her stand up. She still was shaky and seemed weak but otherwise restored to health.

I brought out a potion.

"Drink this," I hissed, "it will taste very bad you must drink it".

She did.

"Rashelle," Wulfren called down, "You should take Laurenna back to the cottage to rest. I've got matters in hand here."

"OK Wulfren, but I have a question for you."

"Yes?"

"How did you know Ragnar was back early?"

"I suddenly was human again. I departed from the hideout. I was in the forest, about halfway to the cottage, when I spotted Ragnar and his men, heading for the castle in a hurry. I carefully followed them. I stopped before I got too close to the castle and I waited. I watched them enter the castle. I swear I could hear his bellow of rage even from outside where I was standing. I waited a bit longer. Then I decided to just go in and kill him then without involving you two."

That explained a lot. It didn't explain why Ragnar knew to come back early. My only guess would be that there had been some sort of magical tie between Ragnar and his shaman, so that Ragnar knew of his death instantly.

To Laurenna I said, "Put your arms around me, I'm going to teleport you home."

She did and I did. Recall only works on one person but if in close enough contact a second person can be carried along. It was awkward because she was taller than I am, but I wanted her out of there and in her cottage as quickly as possible.

We went into the cottage and I put her in her bed.

"Sleep now. You are safe now."

I then turned to Sigrid.

"Ragnar and all of his cronies are all dead. Only the regular guards remain and they were always loyal to Wulfren. It's over. Wulfren rules now. He is in the castle now. You are free."

Sigrid said; "Oh Rashelle, thank you for everything," and gave me a hug.

Wow, so that's basically it eh? Looks like Ragnar got his comeupings and a bit more. Good work. I wonder what you'll write about next. Though I might be jumping to conclusions here, it seems like this story deserves at least one more update to sums things up.

12. Conclusion

The next day we were all in the throne room when Wulfren brought up a concern: "I still have to clear my name in regard to my father's murder."

"Look Wulfren. Who made this claim that you murdered him?"

"Ragnar."

"Anyone else?"

"Errr, no."

"And what does Ragnar say now?"

"Nothing."

"Did anyone see your father's murder actually occur besides you, Ragnar and Kreikan?"

"No."

"Laurenna, do you believe Wulfren killed your father?"

"Certainly not."

"Sigrid, did Wulfren kill your husband?"

"No!"

"Wulfren. Did you kill your father?"

"Certainly not, lass! I saw Ragnar kill him!"

"Wulfren. As Chieftain, who do you answer to?"

"No one."

"Wrong. We'll settle this matter right now. Come with me. You also," I said indicating Laurenna and Sigrid.

I lead them through the anteroom. The guard there saluted Wulfren.

I led them outside and down the steps.

"Speak nothing of 'clearing your name' for now" I whispered to Wulfren.

We reached the village.

"Wulfren, By the gods it's good you are back!"

"It's Wulfren! It's the chieftain."

He was greeted in a similar manner by more villagers as we continued along. I led them to the main hall. We entered.

"Wulfren! It's Wulfren!"

"He's back! Laurenna was right!"

We walked towards the center of the room. I could hear more villagers entering the Main Hall behind us.

"Our chieftain is here"

"Mead for the chieftain!"

I looked at Wulfren. "Do you understand now?"

"Aye lass, the people have spoken. I am the rightful chieftain."

Someone passed him a mug of mead. Was that a tear in his eye?

"Laurenna and Sigrid are safe and I am now rightful chieftain of Lokken. Oh what a happy day this is!" said Wulfren.

Wulfren then announced; "Mead is no longer restricted!"

That got a loud cheer.

Someone had handed me a mug of mead. I'd have to drink it just to be polite.

Taking a cue from my experiences at at Thirsk I raised my mug and shouted; "All hail Wulfren The White, Chieftain of Lokken!"

The response was deafening.

After a moment Wulfren faced me and said; "There is one more thing I must talk about with you now."

"No reward is necessary ... "

"Oh bother on that, take what you want from the castle, but that's not what I want to talk about."

"Oh."

"Rashelle, over the past few days I have developed some feelings for you. You have saved our family. I have seen you fight like a berserker, an avenging Valkyrie".

Valkyrie. Righhhht. I knew where this was heading.

"Rashelle, would you marry me?"

I really wished he had not asked that with Laurenna and Sigrid and half the village standing right there. Sigrid was giving me a "say 'yes'" look.

"Wulfren, we have shared some adventures and I am fond of you but I do not love you. There is no attraction of that sort."

His eyes were downcast like a sad little puppy. It made me feel like a heel.

"You are more like a brother to me, the brother I never had. The brother I would have liked to have known while growing up."

That went over well, both with him and (more importantly) with the potential mob surrounding us.

"You are chieftain now," I continued, "You have a job to do. There will be another woman, better for you. Don't pine over a silly Breton girl."

He nodded, and gave a little smile. Good: he'd buck up.

Sigrid gave me a little smile. Good: she didn't hate me either. I had managed it so that Wulfren could save face. Best use of speech craft I'd ever done, and just when I most needed it.

Then I remembered something.

"Wulfren. Please hold that thought. I'll be right back. Really. You'll like this."

I darted outside, turned left, and ran to Lisendra's house.

I knocked on the door. "Lisendra! Open up! I have good news!"

She opened the door and looked at me.

"What's all the yelling about? What's going on?"

I grinned and said, "Come with me."

She did.

We entered the main hall. I stepped to one side and gestured to Wulfren.

There was immediate silence in the hall. To silence a roomful of Nords who haven't had mead in a while is quite an accomplishment.

She gaped; she gasped.

"WULFREN!!!!"

She rushed towards him and threw her arms around him.

"Wulfren I'm sorry I'm sorry. I was stupid. I love you. I didn't realize this until you were gone. Oh I begged the gods to tell you one more time that I loved you, and now I can."

Then the party began in earnest. Nords sure know how to party.

I stayed for a few days, helping them clean up and also getting myself some well-deserved rest. Snorri and I had a particularly distasteful time cleaning up the shaman's room, removing his Wards and disposing of the things he had in there. I ended up having to use fire to cleanse that room.

I also cleared up a little problem that the castle berserkers were having, with the help of Granny Torunn. I consider myself a master of alchemy but that woman could teach me more than a thing or two!

Finally the day came when I knew it was time to go. After a quick meal alone in the castle kitchen I packed my things and walked into the throne room to say goodbye.

"Wulfren, it is good to see you on the throne. Sigrid, it is good to see you not in the tower."

"Thank you again Rashelle".

"I have enjoyed your company and your hospitality but now it is time for me to be leaving."

"Won't you stay in Lokken?" asked Wulfren.

"I have to go. I will miss you all."

I turned to Laurenna.

"I will miss you most of all, Laurenna my good friend. I will come back and visit".

Laurenna and I clasped hands. I said to her, "I know your vow is over but you should keep the short hair, it looks cute."

"I might. It looks good on you also."

"Well, that's that I guess."

"Won't you stay in Lokken?" said Laurenna.

"No, I have set things to rights here and now must move on."

"Rashelle, please stay."

"I have obligations to my House."

"Rashelle. Please stay. Stay here ... with me."

Focus, Rashelle; the important things. What is really important: a faction or a ... friendship?

I stayed.

Wulfren is to marry Lisendra. It looks now that she is more mature she will be able to make the relationship work this time. Laurenna is sceptical but willing to wait and see.

Fjorngrin continues to raise the snow bears. Sometimes Laurenna and I go and play with them. They took to her right away, as I somehow knew they would. I think the companionship of the snow bears is good for Fjorngrin as he drinks much less these days and keeps his house cleaner.

Sigrid has gone back to teaching the children how to read.

Laurenna and I made some trips to Vvardenfell and Mournhold and have had some fun adventures there but we both agree that Lokken is much nicer. This is my home now. I am freed of any obligations to the affairs of gods and emperors. I am surrounded by friends. And I do so love the snow.


--
Afterward

I've never written anything before. No, that is not true. I've never finished an entire story before, nor posted it. I chose to write a Lokken fanfic because it would be a short story and not a novel. Also I chose Lokken because it's my favorite quest plugin.

I've not followed the Lokken story-line exactly. Some changes were necessary as part of the translation from the nonlinear media of a Morrowind plugin to the linear medium of text: suddenly I had to keep track of time: I couldn't have Rashelle stop in the middle of one important time-dependent task to go do a second task.

Some changes were necessary because of my limited writing skills: I dropped an entire sub-thread of the Lokken "main" quest in order that I could keep track of everything. I hope Emma doesn't mind.

Some changes were caused by the characters. I've heard "real" writers talking about how sometimes their characters "take over" the story. I've never had that happen ... until this story. In chapter four Rashelle wanted to beat that Imperial. The Imperial didn't want to shut up. Then Fjorngrin was not content to be a mere 2-dimensional "quest giver" NPC, no ... he had to assume three dimensions and step out of the page and write the chapter.

Rashelle is based on my Morrowind character of the same name. Writing this story actually forced me to think through some sort of back-story for her. That was interesting.

Thanks to the following authors of Morrowind fanfic for their inspiration:

Treydog ("The Story of Tray")

OverrideB1 ("The Tale of Sudhendra Vahl")

Minque ("Serene of Cyrodiil")

Their stories showed me that Morrowind Fanfic could not only be done, but done well, with quality writing, realistic personalities and plausible motivation.

I especially like Minque's work because she is taking greater liberties with the main quest, yet making it all consistent, original and intense. I (and most likely everyone else on these forums) eagerly await each installment.

Thanks to Bethesda softworks for creating this great game and for including a construction set ... and for creating an entire world with a rich heritage and culture.

Thanks to Emma and her team for creating the wonderful White Wolf of Lokken Mountain plugin and giving it such compelling three-dimensional characters: I actually said "If they harm one hair on her head they will die" out loud when Ragnar's men kidnapped Laurenna. No other plugin has "touched" me like Lokken has. When it was over I was happy that my character had saved the day but sad that it was over. I felt that I had had adventures with them and gotten to know them in their wonderful snow-covered land.

Thanks for all the comments/critiques here. This story has had many improvements & corrections since its original posting because of them.

As for what is next ... perhaps another Rashelle adventure.

Wow, your conclusion wraps everything up very nicely. I was actually very impressed that Rashelle decided to stay in Lokken with everyone. Being the Nerevarine and having to experience all that she had to, you'd think that Rashelle would want to continue the adventuring. Yet, staying in Lokken just seems to fit so well.

I do you decide to write another story for us here. I'd love to see what new techniques or advances in your story writing you would utilise. When reading material from other writers I've been able to see such advances (specifically with the writer jack cloudy, each of his stories have been getting better and better). It would be great to see what you could do.

Congratulations on actually finishing a story (something I have yet to do excluding short stories that I had to write for school).

Ah, Mallet. You're making me blush.
Ahem, I do admit that my writing has improved by quite a bit. Practice makes perfect after all. So by all means, feel free to share whatever story you might feel like writing.

On the whole, your story was a good one and the ending was really nice. At first it seemed like Rashelle wanted to pull the Western end. The lone hero riding off towards the sunset. (Only without a horse this time.)
But when she stayed, it felt right. I mean, she's basically left Redoran already just by coming to Lokken. So why not make it official and stay in a nice place?

And as an added bonus, I hunted down the mod and downloaded it, without the patch I won't need. Because I will get Bloodmoon someday, even if I have to take over the world first! *scrambles off to the designtable with the 'big lasergun of blackmailing doom project' on it.*

Thank you Blockie for your nice words! It pleased me very much when you comment my story here and at Emma�s...Also I want to thank you for coming here and post your story! I told you it is a great one and that the sweeties here would like it right?

Now we will wait for you to share more of your work with us! And it�s so true what "Commentasaurus" says..the more you write the better the story is! I must say I�m more satisfied with my latter chapters of Serene than with the first ones. I�m now into letting them be more edited to fit in better.

Now I must also add that I�m truly inspired to go and download the Lokken-mod! In fact I�ll probably do it pretty soon!

So dear Blockhead, you�ve added some quality-reading here and we appreciate it a lot!

Ohhhh. It's over... I guess it is time to read Rashelle And The Mad God then. See you there.