WOW sorry it took so long but ive been really busy. I think this one is a lot better than the prologue but you be the judge. Well here it is




This is the 1st chapter to the stories of Raecon the Legionnaire

The Stories of Raecon

Chp.1

What I need you to do is go get the land deed from widow vabadas. She lives over the hill on the west side of town.

Sir, yes sir.

I walked over the hill and stepped into her hut.

Excuse me are you widow vabadas.

Yes what concern is it of yours.

I want the land deed.

No, the Imperial Legion killed my husband. He knew it was closed but we had no kwama eggs. He went in there and they slaughtered him. I will never give you the land deed unless you can find out what happened to my husband.

I doubt the Imperial Legion would kill him. But as you wish I will try to find out what happened to him.

And with that I left the Vabadas hut. I made my way across the bridge, which was very rickety. I approached the door and tried to open it but it was locked. A dunmer came from behind me and told me that it was locked. I asked him for the key but he refused. I told him I needed it to complete a mission, but he still refused. With that I sighed and walked away. When he turned around I crept up behind him and slit his throat with my sword. I took the key and went inside. A miner confronted me and told me to be careful. He said the kwama’s are used to the miner’s smell but not mine. I went into the room where the queen was. Another Legionnaire asked me what I was doing here. I told him I had a personal errand to attend to. He said without General Darius’ approval I had no right to be here. I begged him to let me stay here but he wouldn’t budge so I charged at him and swung my sword violently. It hit his shield and I recoiled giving him an opportunity to strike. He swung and his sword pierced my cuirass and cut my flesh. I fell on the ground in agonizing pain. He tried to finish me off, but I rolled out of the way got up and shot a fireball at him. He dodged it which gave me some time. I came at him at struck his helmet with the side of my sword. He flew back five feet and right in front of a kwama warrior. With one zap of lightning it was over. There was just a puddle of what used to be his face. Now I had other problems to deal with. And to make things even better another warrior came from behind it. I ran at the first one with my sword high in the air. I swung but he just hit the sword aside and shoved me against the wall. They both shot lightning bolts at me. I dodge the first one but the second one hit my arm which completely immobilized it. I picked up the sword with my other hand and stabbed the first warrior in the stomach. I pulled the sword out and the warrior, fazed by my attack fell down into a puddle of his own blood. The second warrior came and flailed his arm at me. His arm hit my already wounded chest and made it bleed even more. I fell backwards and with my final ounce of strength shot a fireball at its face. It was temporarily blinded, so I came in for the kill. With one swipe I decapitated it. I went into the room with the queen and searched thoroughly. I found a chest behind a rock and opened it. It had a journal in it.

I am fading fast. I can feel death creeping up on me. I came here yesterday to collect some kwama eggs for my family. I don’t want to explain what I had to do to get in. I was struck down by a miner. I did not get a glance at the man who wished my bereavement. He stabbed me in the back with a miners pick and ran off. I awoke face down shocked at what had happened. This is probably my last day alive. Whoever finds this, I want you to give this too my wife.

That is where it ended. I picked up the journal and headed out. I walked to Vabadases hut and gave her the journal.

Why, I had no idea. You look badly injured, stay here for the night.

Not wanting to be rude I stayed for the night. She made scrambled kwama eggs and cooked some crab meat for breakfast (yummy).

Now about that land deed, could I possibly have it?

Oh, why of course take it. And thank you again for finding out what happened to my husband.

I took the land deed and left her house. I went inside the Maddach tradehouse and downstairs into General Darius’ chambers. I gave him the notebook and turned around to leave.

Wait one second. It’s good and all that you got the land deed. But my sources told me that two legionnaires outside and inside the egg mine were found dead. WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE. DO YOU THINK YOU CAN GO AROUND SLAUGHTERING YOUR OWN MEN JUST TO COMPLETE A MISSION? WELL YOU CAN’T, AND IT BETTER NOT EVER HAPPEN AGAIN. But otherwise good work, you got the job done. Here have this steel cuirass. So, are you ready for another order.

Nice story. The battle scene with that legion soldier inside the mine was portrayed pretty well. But it has some bad points. You sometimes forget to write words like for example:
"No, the Imperial Legion killed my husband. He knew it was closed but we had no kwama eggs. He went in there and they slaughtered him"
What did he know was closed? Where did he go? The kwama mine, but I know that from playing the game. But this thing happens to me too so don't worry. And if you want to make writing your story easier, you really should read Treydog's "The story of Trey". It's a story much like yours in writing style and story aproach. Both your stories tell how you did the various quests of Morrowind while you add some stilization. Good Work overall but try to be more original next time, like Trey. And btw, in my quests for the Legion, I always barge in and kill Widow Vabdas. No point going against a leggionaire and 2 kwama warriors when you can just kill an old lady right?

You're making progress fast. The comment from the captain sounds weird though.
,,Oh, you just killed my people? You can't do that. I should throw you out but I'll give you a nice bit of armour to protect you when you try to kill more of my people instead."

I like it. Whenever you feel like it, please continue.

ok thanx for the replies and for you who dont know thats not what happens in the real game and does anyone know if you can find out what acctuly happend to him

You can, and I did. Just make your way into the underground stream and you'll have an interesting encounter. Don't be aggressive!

okay thanx and expect another chp in a few days

I didn't know what happened cause's I've already told you, I never help that old woman. I just barge in there and kill her to get my armour. Simple as cake. Rather than geting attacked by that leggionaire inside the mines. I should really try helping that woman sometimes. That stream sounds interesting.

sorry, I feel like I am nagging or something...but I miss the quotation marks now...and being told who is doing the talking....but nice storyline...from what I read of it....bugged me after a bit that I was getting lost...plus my attention span is too small to read anything much...*sigh* I think I am losing my mental faculties.....my memory is really bad in the short term...maybe I should stop doing things that are non-essential so that I have more ability to focus on the things that are important....like finishing my classwork.

btw you need to add some paragraphing to that huge paragraph in the middle.... also I dont think you are supposed to start a paragraph with "and with that..." You really should ask someone to edit your work...as I said...minky says there are people who are willing to do it...I am not really good at it though.

Well im not doing any more fan-fics for a while. So nobody has to suffer anymore. Im have a big report due and i wont be doone until after oblivion is released. But expect to find Raecon in some Oblivion stories