"Hey, you wake...OUCH! whad'ya hit me for fool?"

"You bothered my sleep and I wake up cranky. Ya F***in' jerkwad."

"Well, neway we are here and the guard's gonna take us away. We are gonna be free soon."

"At least you woke me up to some good news then. oh oh I see the guard walking towards us now"

"Come with me, up..."

"Shut up and let's go!" I interrupted.

"On deck now."

"Smell ya round about never suckka" I said as I walked up to topside and there was a pig walkin' toward the boat, he was lookin' righ' at me so I knew he was an escort. "HEY you there in the bling armor. Let's get a move on!" I yelled as I ran down the ramp, jiub was right behind me, that jerk.

"first off where are you from?"

"Well why don't you ask the captain, or someone who got to navigate, or at least someone who saw sunlight while on boat, huh?"

"I am from a village north of here, and my obnoxious company here is from somewhere that is glad to be rid of him, suffice it to say that he's a unique fellow of odd talents, not that he uses them much." Jiub was such a softy, makes me wonder how he ever got a face scar, prolly steped on a muck rack that hit his face.

"Fine, I want you to go to the Office there while I take care of things here."

"Sure, whatever." Once inside the old guy wanted to talk to me but I went straight for the door, I had no intention of letting some old guy slow me down. AND>.......the door was locked, " hey bub, open this door so that I can go..that's the whole reason I am here right?"

"No, you are here to get recorded and you will go into the next room to get let go. and You are NOT getting in there without being released by the man you are obviously trying to ignore....oh now you will have to wait on that dark elf to finish paper work, and I think I will hold him until yours is done too so that you are sure to get a hard time from him for slowing him down too."

"Ah, man that's wack. I don't like this one bit. but then again it seems they are just about done, so how bad can it be right?"

"That's a better attitude, and you will want to control your tongue here or else you are going to find quite a bit of trouble coming your way."

"I didn't know that guards were allowed to hand out empty threats like that, maybe I should see abouthaving you transferred somewhere cold..." and there it was, the anger from a threat was all that was needed to set the guard scarlet red and about to burst into a yelling fit, it was at this moment that Jiub was getting done and I grabbed the key from the guard's pocket while he was glaring at me for a moment before he started yelling.

"Why you little punka** b*t** I oughta have you put right back on that ship and have you put in shakles and left for middle ocean fishes dinner!!!!"

"More empty threats, wow you are going for the perma frost huh?" It was at this point that the old man interrupted us to cool off his personal guard.

"Stop that screaming Vanilla Famirick, it doesn't do much for your awareness, you might notice something missing if you were not busy paying attention to what a young moron from a prison boat had to say about your legal problems" With that the man began to look embarrassed, angry, and frantic all at once, he was frantically looking for what was missing that is..."It's your key that the little pickpocket took." The guard's mood didn't improve at this point.

"Give me that back you lousy second rate foolish" he was pulling his sword out as he was talking so I decided to interrupt.

"Your insults are weak, fool. Here's your key, I ain't so lousy when I got the key from ya without even your knowing it while you were looking right at me. The only thing that is second rate in here is your lack of control over yourself, heh heh"

To this the old man smiled, much to my surprise, "Well, you are a mighty intelligent and fiesty one. You use more than just your hands to steal, but you can't be too great if you got yourself put in prison and shipped here." Now he was trying to make me mad, and I wasn't bout to fall fo' my own games.

"Old man what is it you want to scribble on your littlw papers, before I bust on outta 'ere?"

"Hmmm what are you good at other than stealing and playing on people's emotions and manipulating situations with conversation? Give me another half a dozen skills or so please."

Well I wasn't about to let anyone know more about me than they could derive from what this man had already seen so I was lyin' out my a** while answering his questions, but I did tell him what I would like to be referred to as....."You can tell them to call me a 'ghetto hood' man"

"How would you spell that? I have never even heard of either one of those words. Is it nordish, you kind oa resemble a nord/redguard/...acctually you look like just about any non-beast race, is your family some kind of cross-breeders?"

"HEY!! you talkin' bad 'bout my peeps, man? I really don't wanna start nothing but I ain't gonna stand for that kinda cr*p!"

"You know what, I don't care that much, so just write it in here on the page, ok?? .....ok, you can go through that door and to freedom. You need to drop by the captain of the guard on the way out though as he said he has a business offer for you."

"Ah now you are talkin' I wanta way to get some grub around 'ere"

Sellus gravius, the cap'n was a gruff lookin' man, when I met him is the last time I had to see Jiub, which brightened my mood a bit. "Ok outlander, I have a package here for you to take to a man in Balmora. Once you get there he will give you your pay. His name is Cassius Cosades and the locals should be able to point you in the right direction to get to his house once you are there. To het to Balmora all you have to do is go out that door, look around for a stilt strider bug to ride in and it sould be less than twenty gold. I am giving you a little extra just for other food stuffs. I am giving you an extra fifty, so Seventy is the most I am giving someone who has as much of an attitude as you...I got a memo." He handed me some gold and a couple letters.

"I am outta here!"

..well....ahmm...cough... doesnt make any sense and not that funny

you have to understand that I only wrote this out of boredom and lack of sleep or some other similar bad combination of stuffs for writing, which is why I didn't work on my main fanfic at the time, this was also to work out some of my urgyness of writing without killing the entertainment value of Hajima's story.

Now I am going to go on with this story and actually try to do a decent job

when I started the story I had no idea except that I wanted to have the character be some kinda punk-idget that was not intelligent enough to be taken seriously, and yet I was still taken thusly.

calm down, i dont have ''high standerds'' i just like a story with a actuel plot and one that makes sense, and how is my post ''not constuctive'' i gave you my opinian and i might be mistaken but that is what you asked for.........

Easy now! Constructive criticism is okay, mean things are not! And pete, if you don´t like a written part , you have the right to say so but you might then want to explain what was not good and also suggest improvements ok?


Besides there are many ways to skin a cat (or how do you say it?)

ty minque for clearing that up, and regardless of how bad it may be I intend to continue with this story as it is a nice break from my main story and kinda semi-inspires me to do more stuff on it.

As I walked out into Balmora I saw the Stilt strider that would carry me away to mai mone' as I got on and went onward I realized that I was already tired again....wow all nighters are a killer

When I got to da new town I went around asking everyone about this cassius until I found someone who could get me to his house. Once I got there I asked if the person was coming to visit him or wha' was up wit dat. He was all like "naw dawg I be headin' to da tav'n fo' da evenin'" so I went on a knockin' solo an' da dude inside was like "I be 'n 'ere so open da door o' go away"

So suddenly I was like inside with all the papers out on da table an' all dat. He said that I could have 200 gold now and that he wanted my help with some local drabble job that didn't sound profitable and alot like trouble, so I was like whatever ma' nizzle. I got outta there like I was a hot potatoe when I got ma pay.

I went over to the local guilds but the fighters guild wouldn't gimme no work, neither would da mages, but I didn't expect nothing from those old fugly shut-ins. I had heard that there was some work over at the fort though so I headed over there an on the way had to go out of the way to avoid a big ol' nix hound.

Once I got there though it was worth it, they were in some sweet outfiting and were set to hire me to get some peeps they didn't want to do in themselves with...blame..and all that...names..and sightings... so I took the job and went back to balmora, When I went to the eight plates to scope my targets I was getting anxious so I went back to the armor guy back at near the fightin' guild an' 'e gav' me ah weap pretty cheap. I walked back to the eight plates and challenged my target to a fight, rather dan accepting or even lookin' at me he jus' kinda waved ees 'and an' den I was outta it....I began to get up and then I felt my head get smashed into the ground so hard that it was like it was going to pop, then it made pain and a CRACK and all was dark

Very silly indeed. I'll keep an eye on it, at least for its entertainment value.

I'm assuming that the grammar and mis-spelled names are purposeful? (Cosades' first name is Caius, not Cassius). They do seem strangely appropriate to the tone of the writing.

omg! I have been getting his name wrong for the last month and a half and no one told me!! not even in my serious story I am writing. The language in this story is supposed to sound kinda suburban or urban possible 'black' or something similar I use this thread to express my writing that isn't serious, or when I have writer's block on my serious story.

I am glad I entertained someone. For a more serious story, and much more frequent updats see my other 'hajima the nin ronin' story/thread.

just to clarify in case anyone didn't realize....the main character just died.....that is what he got for being overconfident, challenging a guy instead of sniping at him with some kinda ranged weapon....and for trusting the imperial legion to give a easy job.

Oh dear. That was certainly an unseemly end. Thanks for telling us his story; it certainly had some amusing moments.

your welcome, I am glad you enjoyed it. I mostly did it for burning off steam and preventing writer block, lol. I am ALPHA BANANA glad that I was doing more than just typing annoyances though.....rofl.

Your character died in that quest? What a noob! Just kiding. There was a story simillar to this one on the official forums but it had full blown Black dialogue. Well. You should have leveled up!

well, I am sorry. But I don't read the official forums....ever! So I didn't know that...and if I did....I would have still done something similar to something else and if I hadn't done that then i would have done something else and that would have been similar to something else that had been written. I am sorry I wasn't the first person to write anything and I am sorry I can't create something so original it is its own genre....aahhhhh sorry its just that I am really tired...its almost three in the morning and I only got like four hours sleep the last two nights and I have been stressed out lately and that without sleep is the equation for crabbyness......but honestly I didn't know that anyone had done anything from a simlar prospective....also if I didn't do it from a "full blown Black dialogue" it's because I didn't know how. Also if ME that needs to level up, I am annoyed. If the character should have leveled up...then I agree and think that was the point of the Imperial Legions trust-flaw. Not sure if that came out which I sleep lack right and I dunno if I know what I was doin' on the thought of legion bye.

It's not YOU that needs leveling up! It's that character. Can't you, you know, revert to a saved game? Well, I'm enjoying your other story though very much. The reason I didn't post this in the stories thread is because I haven't read it all. I'll do the best I can though. Cheers!

lol, revert to a save game...rofl....I would have trouble justifying that in the story, although I can think of a way to do it...it would still come off as a really big stretch...besides my heart wasn't really in making this a long story, I just did it to blow off some steam, since I wrote this they made a thread for really short stories and I wish I had had the foresight to make this thread open to all such stories, but I wasn't really thinking about anyone else at the time....I must be one selfish jerk huh?

Anyway, I am glad you like hajima, I am posting less often so I would be able to do more schoolwork. You should be able to catch up fairly easily b/c of that.